Foreign Territory: A Trip to Bespin
by dantsolo
Summary: Han Solo and Princess Leia begin the long journey of exploring their relationship, and arrive at Bespin, very much in love. And in between, there is this... My first fic in 14 years...I hope you enjoy it :)
1. Chapter 1

Foreign Territory

By Dant Solo

Princess Leia sifted through Han's meager wardrobe, searching for something to sleep in. Her white coldsuit was far too warm and uncomfortable. She would have to throw the suit and her undergarments in the valet.

All of Han's shirts would be huge on her but she managed to find one old, white shirt that was a bit smaller than his others. She stripped out of her coldsuit and donned Han's shirt. It came down to her knees, but it would have to do.

Now what would she wear on her bottom? The thought of wearing Han's undergarment made her blush. She finally settled on a pair of gray sleep shorts that also looked as if they had seen better days. With some effort, she managed to cinch them tight enough to stay on her slim hips.

She couldn't believe the predicament they were in. Flying at sublight speed, they would arrive at Bespin in thirty-eight days. It would be the longest trip of Leia's life. She had always taken lightspeed for granted.

Now here she was in Han's cabin, confused about where things stood between them and what Han's intentions were.

 _"_ _Princess, you can sleep in my cabin."_ He had informed her once they were underway.

Before she could retort that she was most certainly _not_ sleeping with him, he had added. _"I'll sleep in the crew quarters."_

She had been so ready for his usual crass behavior but he had surprised her with his chivalry. She had travelled on the Falcon before for a few days at a time. He had never before offered his cabin.

But he had never kissed her before either.

Her body suffused with heat at the memory of Han's lips against hers. She hadn't been able to think, had barely been able to breathe. His proximity so unnerved her; the closer he drew to her the less she was able to resist. His hand massaging hers had felt so warm, his presence had surrounded her; she had felt lost and helpless to resist. So many feelings…exhilaration, fear, confusion…too many, in that moment, to process.

She felt so flustered. A part of her wanted that moment back, _craved_ it. She felt so drawn to him all of a sudden. But it also scared her. She felt so out of control. And Leia _hated_ not being in control. There were very few times in her life that Leia hadn't felt in control of herself in a situation, and at the moment she couldn't recall even one. She had remained in control of her feelings when captured by Vader. When Tarkin had destroyed Alderaan, Leia was devastated, but held herself together until she had the time and energy to grieve. Not once did she show weakness in front of her enemies. She was a master at affecting a brave façade. She had been prepared for it all her life.

But she hadn't been prepared for Han Solo. She had never given much thought to romance before. Her life was dedicated to the Senate, and then the Rebel Alliance, from the early age when young girls are just starting to learn about dating and romance.

She had known the mechanics of kissing, of course. But she had been unprepared for the reality of it. No one had ever told her how warm and soft a man's lips would feel, how his scent would engulf her and remain on her hands for hours after. She never knew about the heat that would sweep through her body, or how afterwards she would feel entrapped in a tractor beam, drawn inexorably to him.

After their escape, things had been all business. Leia was tasked with taking inventory of their food and water supply. They had to make sure it lasted the next thirty-eight days.

Several times she had caught Han watching her. She smiled tentatively, uncertain how to behave in this new dynamic. He had smiled back with a thoughtful expression. Perhaps he was as confused as she.

Ignorance was not a familiar feeling for Leia. Almost everything she had ever tried had come easily to her. Immersed in politics before her thirteenth birthday, Leia had been a natural on the Senate floor. And once promised to the Rebellion, she learned to shoot a blaster with quick accuracy. Her combat skills had surprised everyone, especially Han.

But matters of romance were unknown to Leia. She had been briefly attracted to a few boys during adolescence, but had never had the time or energy to pursue it. Now she was out of her element and it made her deeply uncomfortable. And she knew that a man like Han Solo certainly had _a lot_ of experience in that area.

She glanced around his cabin, wanting to know more about who Han Solo was. He was not very forthcoming about his past. She laid back against the pillow and could smell the masculine scent of him. Lying on his bunk, surrounded by his personal things, felt so...intimate. She felt a frustrated yearning. She wanted to see him, be near him again, but she felt self-conscious seeking him out. She simply didn't know how to casually approach him at this point. And so she stayed in his cabin, feeling a deep sense of discontent.


	2. Chapter 2

Thank you so much for reading and reviewing. Special thanks for the warm welcome back from those who remember me back in the day! It's great to be back in that galaxy far, far away :)

Han entered the cockpit of his beloved, temperamental ship. He checked some readings then noticed his datareader open to a new file. He picked it up, examined it, and his brow rose in surprise. Not only had Leia provided him with a very organized inventory of their food and water supplies, she had also devised a distribution schedule. She was very thorough.

He dropped into his pilot's chair and allowed his mind to drift to the kiss they had shared. Three years he had been wanting to kiss her. He had almost come close a few times in the past, but something had always intruded. He had pretty much given up on the idea, had been ready to take off and not look back. But fate had intervened.

Solo wasn't much of a believer in fate. He preferred to believe he controlled his own destiny. But the way things had recently played out…well, he was starting to think there might be something to the idea of fate after all.

If he hadn't gone back for her in the command center…if the ice wall hadn't collapsed when it did she would've made it to her transport…if the hyperdrive hadn't failed he would be arriving at the fleet shortly. If any of these things had been different, none of this would be happening. And despite the danger and inconvenience, Han was thankful for this opportunity to get closer to Lea.

He hadn't intended to kiss her. He had only wanted to help with the valve and have an excuse to be near her. But her response to his nearness, to his touch, had been palpable. When he realized she was trembling, it had touched something deep inside him that he had thought long dormant. He had always had a strong suspicion that she had feelings for him…but the intensity of her reaction surprised him.

The intensity of his own feelings surprised him as well. When she abruptly fled at the first opportunity, he had experienced such a sharp sense of disappointment and longing. Threepio was lucky Han hadn't dismantled him on the spot.

Now, here they were. She was holed up in his cabin and all he wanted was to kiss her again, over and over, crushing her to him. But Leia was most definitely not like other women he had known. He had not waited all this time only to push her into something she was not ready for. He didn't want to screw this up.


	3. Chapter 3: Explorations

Happy Friday! Have a great weekend :)

Leia removed the pins that held her hair in place, flipped her head upside down, and ran her fingers through the dark locks to untangle the braids. There were so many nights when she had to leave her hair up in case she had to flee during the night or because there simply wasn't time do deal with it in the morning. Now, all she had was time.

When her hair was unbound and free, Leia stood, running her hands through it to smooth it down. She heard a quick rap on the cabin door and froze. She hoped it was Han yet was scared at the same time. Her voice faltered in response. "C-come in."

The door slid open and Leia's stomach dropped. Han stood in the doorway, mouth open as if he had been about to speak. Instead, his eyes went wide and his gaze started at her toes and travelled with painful slowness up her body to the cascade of hair that fell past her shoulders. He finally arrived at her eyes.

Leia became suddenly aware of her appearance, blushed, and stared at the floor.

Han recovered quickly. "My clothes look better on you than they ever did on me," he said in a husky voice.

Leia's blush darkened. She could form no response to that so she changed the subject. "I, um, finished the inventory."

Han nodded, distracted, as his glance raked her entire form again. Leia felt much smaller than she usually did next to the smuggler. "I'm glad you found something more comfortable to wear." He smirked ever-so-slightly. "It's going to be a long trip to Bespin."

"Yes, it is," she replied simply. She crossed her arms over her chest. "I left the inventory file in the cockpit."

Han stepped inside the cabin and the door slid shut behind him. "Is that what you want to talk about?" he asked quietly.

Leia averted her eyes momentarily. What was she supposed to say? Regaining a modicum of confidence, she met his stare. She was tired of feeling so timid, it was unlike her.

"What would you like to talk about, Captain?" she challenged.

Han offered a crooked smile. Leia wondered what he was anticipating. It surprised her how much she wanted to close the distance between them. Her body wanted to be close to his again, but she wasn't sure of his intentions and she was clueless as to how to initiate.

Han gazed at her expectantly then ambled to the bunk and sat down, forearms resting on his knees. He glanced around the room and his eyebrows shot up. "Did you clean up in here?"

"A little." Her hands twisted together almost of their own accord. In the past, she might have bristled at the way he barged in and sat on the bed, regardless of the fact that it was his cabin. Now, she couldn't decide if she liked the familiarity or not. Should she sit down next to him on the bed or would that imply more than she was prepared for? What was she prepared for?

She looked at him to find that he was watching her with an odd expression.

"C'mere," he implored in a low voice, patting the spot next to him on the bunk.

Leia hesitated for a brief moment, wondering what would happen if she did. Her desire for Han's nearness won over her better judgment. When she joined him on the bunk, she noted that he seemed to relax, as if mentally sighing in relief over her compliance. His expression softened slightly. It made him appear younger and very handsome.

He reached for her hand, slowly, as if allowing her enough time to rebuff. She looked down at their joined hands then met his uncharacteristically serious gaze. She offered a tentative smile and that seemed to be all the encouragement he needed. He bent his head to kiss her and the galaxy slowly drifted away.

Leia's body trembled again at the touch of Han's lips and she was dimly embarrassed by her reaction but was quickly lost in the kiss. He kissed her gently, almost tentatively, then pulled back slowly to look at her through lowered lashes, as if to gauge her reaction. When her eyes drifted to his lips, he kissed her again, more passionately this time. Leia was unprepared for the emotions that stole over her and was shocked that she could feel the kiss throughout her entire body.

Han opened his mouth and she mirrored his tender movements. When his tongue found hers with a slick caress, Leia moaned softly in the back of her throat.

Han groaned in response and pulled her tightly to him. Leia found that sound and the feel of his body intoxicating. Her fingers dove into the soft hair at the back of his neck. The feeling of their intermingling tongues caused a deep, unfamiliar throbbing between her legs.

When Han finally broke the kiss, Leia was breathing harshly. Her entire body was on fire and she wanted nothing more than to continue kissing him, pulling him closer, feeling his skin under her hands.

Their gazes locked and Han smiled. It wasn't his usual cocky, devil-may-care grin. It was a genuine smile that reached his eyes. Leia offered a shy smile in return, glanced away then returned to stare unflinchingly back. His eyes were beautiful. She had always thought so but she had never looked at them so closely before. Flecks of green danced inside hazel. And right now they were smiling into Leia's own.

She glanced down at their entwined hands with a shy smile.

"What?" Han asked playfully.

Leia looked back at him and her smile turned to a grin. "I'm not sure what to say," she replied. She looked at their joined hands again and began to softly stroke Han's fingers.

"Well," Han teased quietly, "you could start by telling me what a great kisser I am."

She raised her eyes and cocked an eyebrow. "Or we could discuss your finest feature…modesty." Leave it to Han to dispel an awkward moment.

Han chuckled, leaned forward, kissed her softly on the lips, then sat back and looked at her again. "We could always discuss your finest feature…"

Leia was sure that she was going to be embarrassed by his next words. She waited, expectant.

He took her chin in his hand. "Your smart mouth!" He grinned to soften his words and for once, Leia was not offended.

" _I_ have a smart mouth?"

"I'm glad we agree."

Leia shook her head, lips quirked to one side. She surprised herself with how much she was enjoying this banter now that their frequent hostility had dissipated. She felt slightly more in her element. "Shut up and kiss me," she whispered, surprised by her own boldness.

Han smiled brightly and seemed happy to oblige. "You're full of surprises, Sweetheart," he whispered before his lips claimed hers again.

Awareness of their surroundings fell away as Leia became immersed in the feeling of Han's mouth and tongue. Gently, Han eased Leia onto the pillow. She did not resist. When his hand slid inside her sleeve and caressed the length of her arm, Leia thought she had never felt anything as wonderful as Han's warm, tantalizing caress on her skin. Had she really spent the last three years of her life avoiding this? At the moment, she couldn't fathom why. His soft touch drifted to her shoulder, inflaming her body, and when his hand grazed her breast, Leia gasped sharply, shocked by the intensity of the feeling.

Warning sirens exploded in her mind and she realized things were moving too fast. "Wait!" she rasped. "Stop!"

Han withdrew as if slapped and struggled to extricate his arm from her sleeve. Finally free, he raised his hands in surrender. "I'm sorry," he panted in a low voice.

Leia's breathing was ragged. She hadn't intended for things to go so far. She was upset with herself more than with him. She blushed crimson and looked away. "It's ok," she mumbled.

Han sat up, away from where Leia rested on his pillow. He put his head in his hands and Leia's stomach dipped. Was he angry at her? Did he think she was leading him on? She sat up and placed a tentative hand on his back.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

Han turned sharply to face her. " _You're_ sorry?" He shook his head. "Sweetheart, you have nothing to be sorry about. Sometimes I forget."

"Forget what?"

"That you're as young as Luke."

Leia glared. "What is that supposed to mean?"

Han chuckled. "It's not a bad thing, Leia."

She thrilled at the sound of her name on his lips, but did not react. "Then what kind of a _thing_ is it?" Arguing was much more familiar territory than kissing was.

Han exhaled a sound of frustration and ran a hand through his hair. "Look, I just meant, you always seem so in control, so…." He hesitated thoughtfully. "So…sophisticated." He shrugged. "You've experienced a lifetime already." He looked her in the eyes as he finished quietly, "I forget you're not as old as you seem."

She looked down self-consciously, feeling defensive. "I'm not that young." When she looked up again, Han was nodding.

"No," he agreed. "But when did you start in politics?"

"I was fifteen when my father started formally training me. I became a Senator at eighteen."

He nodded again. "And you were nineteen when you hooked up with the Rebellion. I just always figured…"

"Figured what?"

He shrugged again. "I figured…you didn't have a lot of time for…" he gestured toward the pillow, "this."

Embarrassment flushed Leia's cheeks. Was her lack of experience that obvious? She hated that he could read her so well.

Slowly, as if afraid she would pull away, Han took her hand in his. He offered a tentative smile, which she returned. He squeezed her hand gently.

"Anyway," he continued, "I got carried away. I'm sorry." His voice was solemn.

"It's ok," Leia repeated.

Awkward silence ensued as they held hands and both glanced at the floor.

"It's actually a compliment," Han broke the stillness.

"What is?"

"That I forget how young you are."

"Why is that a compliment?"

"I never thought of you as a kid. Luke, I thought of as a kid, even though you guys are the same age. He was so naïve when I met him. And he kind of still is. You were never naïve."

Leia thought about his words. They made sense. She often thought of Luke as being younger than herself, even knowing that he wasn't. She looked up at the handsome Corellian. "How old are you, Han?" Leia had always been curious.

He stiffened, taken aback. His uncharacteristic open expression was suddenly cloaked by his usual mercenary mask. He smirked. "A lot older'an you, Sweetheart."

She rolled her eyes but inside she felt disappointed that Han had closed up so quickly. She had been enjoying his openness.

Deliberately changing the subject, he took a silky lock of her hair between his fingers and declared, "You should wear your hair down more often. I like it."

Leia flushed with pleasure. All her life she had been complimented on her thick, flowing hair. But hearing it from Han's lips brought new value to it. "It's not that practical for daily life with the Alliance."

Han's lower lip jutted out in acknowledgement. "Guess not. I'll just enjoy it while I can then." He grinned and Leia smiled back, pleased.

They sat quietly for a moment, smiling at each other. "Thank you for letting me stay in your cabin," Leia finally broke the silence.

"No problem. I figure this trip will be too long for you to stay in the crew quarters. I want you to be comfortable."

Leia was not use to Han being so chivalrous. He had never seemed concerned with her comfort before. Although had he offered his cabin in the past she most likely would have declined. "Well, thank you. It's very sweet of you."

"Sweet," Han echoed. "You've definitely never called me that before."

Leia enjoyed his light, teasing tone. "You've never been sweet before," she chided.

Han chuckled. "Well, don't let it get around. It'll ruin my reputation."

Leia laughed. "I won't tell anyone about your sweet side. We wouldn't want anyone else to know that there's more to you than money."

Han grinned. "Then I won't tell anyone about _your_ sweet side." He gestured between them.

Leia was embarrassed but enjoying Han's mischievous flirtation. "That would _definitely_ ruin my reputation."

Han laughed loudly and placed a gentle palm across her cheek. His expression faded to a soft smile and he caressed her lower lip with his thumb. The sensation caused Leia to shiver slightly. He stared into her eyes, kissed her tenderly, then sat back to look at her. She cast a glance at the floor, feeling suddenly bashful again under his scrutiny.

"Leia?"

She looked up at him and his eyes were serious.

"I don't want you to do anything you don't want to do," he said softy. "But I don't want to leave you tonight. Can I sleep here with you? Just sleep, that's all."

Leia's breath caught. She could see he was sincere. But…this was all happening so fast. This morning, they had been at each other's throats and now here they were on his bunk. It was too much all at once.

She bit her lip and when she met his eyes she could see that he already knew her answer.

He started to rise. "It's ok, Sweetheart." He leaned over and kissed her forehead.

"Han," she called, catching his hand.

He sat back down on the bed. When she opened her mouth to speak, Han placed a finger to her lips.

"Shhh," he soothed. "I don't want you to do anything you don't want to do. I meant that." He stroked her cheek then kissed her softly. "G'night. I'll see you in the morning."

Leia could form no words as she watched the door slide shut behind him.

She found herself missing him and was unable to sleep for hours afterwards.


	4. Chapter 4: A New Day

Thank you for continuing to read :) I appreciate it! Time for the Princess to wake up and face her first full day with her favorite scoundrel...

Leia's eyes opened to darkness. She glanced at the chrono, noted it was morning cycle, then laid back and stretched languidly. She had no memory of the last time she had woken up and _not_ had to jump up and start her day.

At the leisurely pace they were currently traveling, Leia had no need to rush. Time was not the luxury it normally was.

Her thoughts quickly flashed to the events of the night before. Warmth cascaded through her as she recalled Han's mouth and hands. The conversation between them had never been so easy and comfortable. She had always been so scared to let him close, not knowing all along how much he could ease her soul.

She hadn't thought she could really trust him. He always boasted that money was his top priority and he constantly mentioned leaving. But how many times had his actions contradicted his words? He had silently proven over and over that sometimes money was the last thing he cared about. And he was still here, three years later. Why hadn't Leia realized this sooner? He spent so much time talking about leaving that she hadn't noticed just how long he had stayed.

 _And for what reasons?_ Leia had asked herself that a number of times, had even asked him the question directly.

 _'_ _The pay's real good.'_

 _'_ _It's a great place to hide out while I save up to pay back Jabba.'_

She had accepted his words at face value often enough. It had also occurred to her that Chewbacca might have had something to do with it. He often seemed to serve as Solo's moral compass. It had even occurred to her that the Corellian pilot's affection for Luke might have played a role.

And these reasons all made good sense.

But maybe…just maybe…Leia might have had some influence on his decision as well. It was difficult to digest this idea. It was so at odds with her past beliefs. The Han Solo she was coming to know was unlike the man she thought she knew.

And her feelings for him were the most surprising of all. Her responses to him were almost as unbelievable as his words and actions of late. He was awakening some deep part of her that she hadn't known existed. And she couldn't resist if she tried.

She stretched once more with a loud groan then pulled herself from the bunk. She couldn't justify lounging in bed when there was work to be done.

She grabbed her coldsuit and undergarments from the table by the bunk, palmed open the door, and made her way to the valet. She could hear tinkering noises from the hold. After depositing her dirty clothes, Leia quietly walked to the refresher. She looked in the reflector and barely recognized herself.

Her hair was strewn in all directions. Between that and Han's huge shirt, she looked like a stranger in the bright light of the fresher.

Leia turned on the flow of the water recycler, relishing the idea of a water shower for the first time in months. Hoth had been much too cold for water showers and Leia didn't care for sonics. She never felt her hair was really clean.

She dropped Han's clothes to the floor and stepped inside the recycler. The water was tepid but it was good enough for Leia. She scrubbed what felt like years' worth of frozen hell and stress from her body.

Once clean, Leia precariously wrapped her hair in one the few small towels she could find. She donned Han's shirt again, and headed back to the cabin, stopping to grab her clothing from the valet.

Once dressed in her coldsuit, minus the jacket, Leia searched through Han's possessions looking for a brush. _He has to have one somewhere._ She was somewhat surprised by the things she found. In one compartment, she found a very old, tattered copy of a book. Not a datafile, but an old fashioned, flimisplast book.

 _A Captain's Tale._

Very interesting. Perhaps this was his inspiration for becoming a pilot. She returned the book to where she found it and continued her search.

The next item of interest that Leia stumbled upon was a necklace. A _woman's_ necklace. The pendant was an intricate weaving of tiny blue and green gems on a simple chain. It was beautiful and somewhat familiar. Perhaps she had once owned something similar. She wondered what the origin of _this_ little memento was and felt a sudden, irrational twinge of jealousy.

Leia abruptly realized she was essentially spying on Han. She quickly dropped the necklace and continued looking for a brush, without further examination of the contents of Han's storage compartments. Finally, she came across a small brush that she guessed Han hadn't used in a long time. She carefully brushed her hair out and, lacking the patience to dry it, ventured out to meet the first full day of their journey.

Entering the hold, she saw Han handing a tool up to Chewie in the overhead compartment. He was wearing a sleeveless gray shirt that was covered in grease stains. Leia couldn't help admiring his strong arms.

Chewie saw her first, growled a greeting then retreated into the compartment.

"Good morning," Leia called as Han's head swiveled in her direction.

"Good morning." He frowned. "You gonna keep wearing that thing?"

She returned his frown. "It's the only thing that fits me."

He approached her slowly, a smile gradually spreading across his features. He bent close to her lips. "You're gonna be hot." He kissed her lingeringly, then looked her up and down. "Come to think of it, you're pretty hot already," he leered.

Leia rolled her eyes then smiled against her will. She heard familiar, clunking footsteps and looked toward the access corridor to see Threepio approaching.

"Mistress Leia," Threepio offered, "If you are feeling warm, I can certainly lower the environmental controls to adjust the temperature to your liking."

"It's ok, Threepio, the temperature is fine."

Han clapped the golden droid on the shoulder a bit gruffly, leaving traces of grime behind. "Yeah, make yourself useful, Goldenrod. Lower the temperature ten degrees."

"Of course, sir." He shuffled out of the hold and Leia turned to Han.

"That wasn't necessary, Han."

He shrugged it off. "There's no reason you should get all sweaty." He paused and threw her a wink. "Unless I'm the one getting you sweaty."

She shook her head and suppressed a smile. "You're on a roll this morning."

He grinned over his shoulder as he strode back to the console he was working on. "What can I say? I had a good night." He turned back to the panel. "There's kaffe in the galley."


	5. Chapter 5: Understandings

Thank you to all readers! Special shout out to my awesome beta reader, Dark Leia, who never lets me get away with anything LOL.

Han turned a corner and saw Leia struggling to heave a large shipping crate onto a shelf over her head. She was still wearing that damn coldsuit, but had pulled her hair back into one long braid. He rushed over, stepped behind her and relieved her of the heavy burden. He placed it on the shelf, turned to her and smiled. He was surprised by her narrowed eyes.

"Why did you do that? I had it." Her voice was angry and defensive.

Puzzled, he shrugged. "You looked like you were having a hard time."

"I wasn't." She placed her hands on her hips in that stubborn stance that Han had come to know all too well.

"Ok, sorry." Han was perplexed. He leaned in the doorway and watched as Leia turned away and began moving more crates. "You know, I just asked you to inventory this stuff. Not to rearrange it." Han could still see the underlying tension in her form. Someone who didn't know her so well would probably have missed it.

He watched her for another moment as she moved a few things and made a note in her datareader. She was so fiercely independent. No matter how hard the task, she always pushed herself to the limit, only seeking help when absolutely necessary. And even when she asked for any kind of assistance, she did so with such grudging resentment.

"You know," he said quietly, "you don't have to be so tough all the time."

Leia bristled visibly and looked up from the datareader. "What do you mean?"

Han wavered for a moment then plowed ahead. "You just don't have to push yourself so hard. You don't have to be so tough, you can ask for help sometimes." He recognized the cold mask that fell over her features; he had seen it many times: when she allowed him a glimpse of her softer side and he proceeded to muck it up.

Her eyes returned to her datareader. When he realized she wasn't going to respond, he stepped closer to her. "Hey," he called softly. He took the datareader from her hands and placed it on a nearby crate, then gently turned her to face him. "I didn't mean anything by it. Talk to me."

Leia exhaled then looked up at him. Her expression was still guarded, but was starting to soften slightly. "Don't you think that sometimes I don't feel so tough?"

"You don't show it," he replied simply. For once, he responded to her anger with a low, calm tone. In the past, her anger had baited his until they ended up in a power struggle. But he didn't want to go back to that. Their relationship had evolved and he was much happier with their new dynamic.

She laughed caustically. "How can I? I have to prove myself all the time."

"What do you have to prove?"

She tried to take a step back but Han held her firmly. "Don't you think I know what everyone says about me? That I'm a figurehead. That I'm here because I have nowhere else to go. That I'm not a military tactician. I'm not a soldier."

Han had heard all these things and more. Each time there were whispers behind her back he felt an irrational urge to defend her, but had kept quiet. It wouldn't help her image to have Han Solo fighting her battles. Now, knowing she had heard the gossip, it made him even more furious.

"So? Who cares what anyone says?" His voice was rough and angry.

She pressed her lips together grimly. "It's not so easy to think that way when you have to give orders and be taken seriously." She paused and the anger lit her eyes again. "So, yes. I do have to be tough. I do have to push myself and show that I'm more than just 'the Princess.'" She suddenly ran out of steam, crossed her arms, and stared in the vicinity of Han's chest.

He was quiet a moment as his mind digested her feelings. He had a sudden, better understanding of her. Finally, he said carefully, "Let me rephrase that: you don't need to be so tough all the time with _me_."

Leia's eyes flew to his and her mouth fell open but no words came out. The anger and bitterness were gone now and were replaced with shock and a vulnerability that brought a deep swell of emotion to Han's chest. They stared at each other a long moment. Leia stepped more fully into his arms, rested her head on his chest, and Han held her tightly.


	6. Chapter 6: Trust

Thank you again, everyone!:) Here's more of our favorite couple!

Han leaned on his side, propped on his elbow, head resting in his hand. Leia smiled softly up at him from the pillow. The peaceful emotion between them surprised Han more than anything. After all the hostility, all the bickering and sarcasm, they actually got along remarkably well.

He couldn't remember the last time he had spent so much time kissing and talking. He wasn't prone to waiting very long on a woman. But he had waited three years already, what was a little longer?

There were moments when he wanted her so badly he thought it might kill him. He wanted to rip her clothes off, devour her body, and plunge deep inside her with animalistic fervor.

But when those feelings overwhelmed him, he looked into her eyes and steadied himself. He reminded himself that this was Leia, and although he generally tried not to examine his emotions too much, he was well aware that his feelings for Leia were deeper than he had ever felt in the past.

He had never been so careful with a woman; had never been so aware of how his words and actions might affect someone. And yet there was this delicate balance between being thoughtful of her feelings and being able to be himself. She no longer took his teasing and sarcasm so seriously. She gave it right back to him with a smile. He found himself completely enjoying every aspect of their new intimacy.

"What are you smiling at, Solo?" Her voice was gruff but her expression was tender.

He tried to stifle a grin but was unsuccessful. "I keep imagining this." Without preamble, Han grabbed her around the waist and rolled to his back, pulling her on top of him. A waterfall of dark, supple hair surrounded them. Han felt it brush his face enticingly.

Startled, Leia laughed, frantically attempting to brush her hair aside. Han grabbed her wrists, gently but firmly.

"Don't," he whispered inside the cocoon of hair. "I've been wanting to see you like this."

Leia relaxed, resting her arms on his shoulders. Han was aware of her eyes on him as he ran his hands through the avalanche of hair.

"Sometimes I think I should cut it-" she began wistfully.

"Don't you dare," he ordered sharply. He realized he had no right to make such a demand and glanced at her expression. She looked pleased rather than angry. Han released a mental sigh of relief.

At moments, it was difficult to remember that she wasn't really _his_. Not that he believed in ownership of another person. But in relationships, if his memory served correctly, there was a sense of belonging to each other. And although he enjoyed this newfound freedom he had with her, he knew it was limited.

In thirty-four days, they would arrive at Bespin. If things went as expected, he would then bring Leia to rendezvous with the Rebel fleet. And then…

He would have to leave her behind. This fact loomed over him. He tried not to think about it but still it intruded. She hadn't brought it up but he was quite certain that she thought about it too.

Leia blew air in the direction of her forehead. "Ok," she said good-naturedly. "This is just too much hair." She rolled off of him, flipped her hair back over her shoulders and pushed it into some semblance of order. She stood up and grabbed her sleep shirt and shorts. "I need to go get changed. I'm so sick of this suit."

She started for the door but Han caught her hand. "Where ya going? You can get changed right here."

She smiled and patted the hand that held hers. "Nice try, nerfherder."

Han laughed, let go of her hand and sat up. "No, I'm serious. Look, I'll turn around." He turned his back to her and sat cross-legged on the bunk. "I won't even peek." He closed his eyes.

"I…don't know," Leia said slowly.

He spun back to face her. "What are you afraid of?" he challenged.

"When did I last hear those words?" she chided.

Han chuckled then looked at her in seriousness. "Do you trust me?" He watched several emotions play across her face as she contemplated his question.

She smiled slightly. "I actually trust you more than most."

He smiled back. "Ok. Then trust me now." Without another word, Han again turned around and waited. After a moment of silence, he heard her removing her suit. True to his word, he resisted the urge to even tease her about turning around.

After a couple of minutes, Han heard her quiet voice behind him. "Ok, you can turn around now."

She was back in his old shirt and shorts, which made her look softer and much more appealing. He winked. "See? I'm trustworthy."

She joined him on the bed, leaning on her elbow. "I probably shouldn't let that get around about you either. That's a lot of secrets to keep." She sighed, dark eyes twinkling.

Han reclined, matching her posture. "Think of it as saving the best for yourself."

She strangled a laugh. "You're awfully full of yourself."

Han was thoroughly amused. "You always said I was full of something."

They burst into laughter at the same time. Han hadn't felt this good in…forever, it seemed.


	7. Chapter 7: Just Sleep

Very short, but very sweet...thank you to all my readers and thank you for the reviews :) I promise to post more soon to make up for how short this post is.

Leia leaned on Han's shoulder in drowsy silence. His head was propped on the pillow of his bunk where they had been talking quietly for several hours. His arm was around her shoulders, cradling her in his warm embrace.

Leia had not felt so content since...she couldn't actually remember when. She was getting sleepy but she really didn't want Han to leave. She didn't want to lose the calm, comfort of this moment.

"Han," she whispered.

He startled slightly and Leia realized he had dozed off. "Oh." He started to sit up but Leia grabbed his arm and held him in place.

"No. Don't go." She placed a hand to his cheek.

Groggy, he frowned. "I know, but it's late. You should get some sleep."

She pulled him close and buried her face against his chest. "Stay," she mumbled sleepily.

Han lay still for a moment. "Are you sure?" he asked in a husky voice.

"Yes," Leia replied, snuggling closer. "Just sleep."

His arms closed around her and lulled her into a deep, dream-less sleep.


	8. Chapter 8: Faulty Systems

Leia awoke to a sense of unreality. She had slept so deeply, something she hadn't done in years. It took her a moment to realize where she was, then another moment to realize she was in the arms of Han Solo. Then reality washed over her like a warm ocean wave.

Waking up to him, cuddled against his warmth, was the most beautiful feeling she had experienced in a very long time. She was amazed by how right it felt to sleep in his arms. Just four days earlier she had turned down his request to stay and sleep. And now _she_ had invited him to stay. Things between them were progressing much more quickly than expected.

Not that Leia had ever expected any of this. She had been fighting this attraction from the beginning. They had gotten off to a most acrimonious start, flinging mild insults at each other in the corridors of the Death Star. By the time they escaped the trash compactor, Leia had noticed how handsome her rescuer was. When he took off like a crazy person after the stormtroopers, she had to admire his bravery.

Once onboard the Falcon, she got a taste of the real Han Solo.

 _"_ _I'm in it for the money. I expect to be well paid!"_

But Leia was finding out that the brash, uncaring man that Han presented was not who he really was after all. For all his bluster of the past three years, he did have a sensitive side. She had glimpsed a tenderness in him over the years but each time she started to soften towards him he turned around and quickly abolished that perception.

But when she thought about it, Leia realized that all the times he was there for her were because he cared. He never let her know it and he infuriated her to the point where it had been difficult to believe. But it was obvious to her now.

She gazed at his features in the dim light of the glow panels. She could just make out the shape of his lips but could not see the scar beneath. She had often wondered how he got that scar but knew better than to ask him questions about his past.

He was so very handsome. She had always tried not to admit just how attractive she found him. There was no longer a reason to deny it. His face was a perfect combination of beauty and ruggedness. The scar on his chin, rather than detracting from his looks, added character.

She loved the size of him...he made her feel small and feminine. It had been a long time since she had been so aware of being a woman. In the past, he had towered over her, trying to bully her with his height as they engaged in a battle of wills. It never intimidated her but it did often bait her anger. Now she surprised herself with how much his tall form excited her.

And his voice. When his breath whispered next to her ear and she heard the soft, deep rumble of thunder utter her name, a thrill passed through her.

A deep wave of affection flushed through Leia as she watched him sleep. She was wide awake now and too excited to lie still. She decided to make some kaffe. She would have it ready for Han when he woke up.

She rose from the bunk and her feet hit the cold metal of the floor. She grabbed a pair of socks from the pile next to the bunk, put them on and padded quietly to the galley.

Chewbacca was already there, kaffe in hand. He growled a greeting.

"Good morning, Chewie."

He growled briefly and Leia was aware it was a question. She looked at him, puzzled, as she often was if she didn't have a context with which to decipher his meaning. She really wished she could understand him better.

He repeated himself, holding his hand to chest-height and shrugging a question, palms up.

As she usually did, Leia instantly understood Chewie's pantomime. "Oh," she replied. "Han's still sleeping." It dawned on her suddenly that Chewie knew that she and Han had spent the night together. Her cheeks flamed instantly and she occupied herself pouring kaffe into a mug.

The rational part of her knew there was nothing to be embarrassed about. She was a grown woman and was free to make her own choices. By the time they reached her age, most women had already been intimate with men many times over. But Leia still felt an irrational urge to explain to Chewbacca that nothing had happened, they had merely slept in the same bed. To do so would be silly on her part. And besides, she doubted Chewie even cared.

"Do you think we'll get help at Bespin?" Leia asked conversationally.

Chewie paused a moment, gave it some thought, then gave a dubious bark.

Leia did not understand his words, but his meaning was clear. She grimaced. "I wish you could tell me something about this Lando person."

Chewie growled at length, his shaggy head moving back and forth animatedly. Try as she might, Leia couldn't decipher his meaning. It was frustrating.

A deep voice boomed behind her. "Too bad you don't speak Wookiee, Your Highnessness."

Leia spun to face Han, feeling suddenly guilty. Yes, she had been seeking information that he had refused to provide. She shouldn't feel as if she had done something wrong. So why did she? "I thought we had agreed you wouldn't call me that anymore."

He leaned in the doorway to the galley, wrinkled white shirt hanging open. He cut an enticing figure and Leia found it hard to think of anything else but the bare skin of his chest and stomach.

"Did we?" he replied casually. "I thought it was just Your Worship we agreed I wouldn't say."

Leia raised an eyebrow and Han chuckled, coming forward and putting his arms around her. He kissed the top of her head.

Chewie grumbled quietly as he headed out of the galley.

"Fine," Han called after him. "I wouldn't want to watch Wookiee mating customs either!"

Leia smiled and slid her hands inside Han's shirt. His skin felt tantalizingly soft and warm.

"Mmmm..." he breathed into her hair. "Thank you for last night, sweetheart."

Leia blushed at the implication, glad that Chewie wasn't there to hear it. "It was my pleasure," she breathed into the smooth, bare skin of his chest.

"It was my pleasure too."

Leia could feel his words reverberate through his chest.

He pulled back suddenly. "I smell kaffe."

"Yes, I'll pour you some." She turned from him and grabbed another mug from the cabinet.

"Thanks for making it."

"I was going to, but Chewie beat me to it." She filled his mug, handed it to him, and retrieved her own. They sipped in silence. Leia was use to bad kaffe by now, but Han's brew was especially bitter. There was no sweetener onboard so Leia drank it with a suppressed grimace. After years of starting the day with a mug of kaffe, she couldn't break the habit.

"Well, thanks for pouring it, then." He winked.

"So polite," she teased.

He smirked. "It's in my best interest to stay on your good side."

"Why is that?" Leia asked playfully.

"I've learned that you're a lot more fun when I'm nice to you."

Leia stifled a laugh. "It took you long enough to figure that out, hotshot."

"I guess I'm a slow learner."

An urgent string of barks grabbed Han's attention. "What?" he called sharply, taking a step away from Leia.

Chewie elaborated noisily.

"Damn," Han muttered. He placed his mug on the counter and hurried off in the direction of the refresher.

"What's broken now?" Leia called after him.

Han ignored her. She put down her mug and followed him to find Chewie standing in the doorway to the refresher.

"It's the water recycler," Han grumbled before she could ask again.

"Is it working at all?"

Chewie's growl was so negative that Han didn't even have to translate.

"Great, what else is going to go wrong?" Leia muttered under her breath. She turned to Chewie. "Can you fix it?"

The huge Wookiee barked with laughter.

Leia looked to Han, bewildered.

Han wasn't amused. Chewie stepped out of the doorway and Han pulled Leia gently by the hand until they were inside the refresher. He gestured to a small space beside the shower, under a counter top. " _That_ ," he told the Princess, "is where the mechanism for the recycler is."

Leia's mouth firmed to a thin line as she realized how unlikely it would be for a Wookiee to get inside that space. She turned to Han.

"Can you fix it?"

He exhaled harshly. "I hope so. No one wants to spend weeks on a ship with an unshowered Wookiee."

Chewie snarled menacingly.


	9. Chapter 9: Men!

Thank you for continuing t read :)

Han was in a foul mood. Leia couldn't really blame him. So many things had gone wrong in the past few of days. They were on a seemingly endless journey and now the water recycler was broken. He had been stuck under the panel in the fresher for several hours now, working tirelessly to fix it.

She found him in the same position she had last seen him: on his back under the panel. She could see by the light of the glow lamp that he had removed his shirt. She could hear, from the string of foul language emanating from under the panel, that he was frustrated.

She crouched down beside him. "How's it going under there?"

There was a sudden spark, followed by a loud, "Blast it!"

"Are you okay?" Leia called urgently.

Han crawled out from under the panel. The sneer on his face was answer enough. He was sweaty and covered in grime. This was one of very few times that Leia dare not utter a derogatory word about his ship. She gave him a small, sympathetic smile. "Don't worry. You'll get it."

He sighed in frustration. "You know, I can fix almost anything. But this thing." He smacked the panel for emphasis. "This thing has me stumped." He exhaled harshly. "I don't know what I'm doing wrong."

"Do you have the manual on file?"

Han laughed, genuinely amused. "Manual. That's funny!"

"Why is that funny?"

"Chewie!" Han bellowed, still laughing.

Leia sat back, shaking her head.

Chewie appeared in the doorway, poking his head in. He growled an interrogative.

Han was still chuckling. He gestured to Leia with a thumb. "The Princess just asked if I have a manual on file for the Falcon."

Chewie guffawed, adding to Han's amusement. He laughed harder.

 _Males,_ Leia thought, mentally sighing. _No matter what the species, they're all idiots._

"Okay," Leia spat. "Why is that so funny?"

Han's laughter began to abate. "Sweetheart, real pilots don't need a manual for their ship."

Chewie roared in agreement.

"Besides, I've made so many modifications, it's barely the same ship."

Chewie bent to Leia, barked shortly, and walked away.

Leia looked at Han.

Han grinned. "He said 'thanks for the laugh, little one.'" He chuckled again.

Irritated, Leia roughly clapped him on the shoulder. "Good luck!" She stood and left the fresher.

"Hey! Leia!" he called after her.

She found Threepio at the ship's computer terminal. "Threepio."

He turned his golden body to face her. "Yes, Mistress Leia?"

"Can you help me find a file in the ship's computer?"

"Why of course, I would be happy to. In spite of the computer's peculiar dialect, I seem to have struck up a rather good rapport."

"Great, thanks. I need to access the ship's manual."

"Yes, Your Highness. Right away."

She turned on her heel and strode away.


	10. Chapter 10: Uh, Thanks

Men can be impossible...but when they look like Han, we can forgive them ;) Hope you continue to enjoy my story, thank you for reading! :)

Sitting at the second terminal of the ship's computer, Leia had been searching for the ship's manual. Naturally, Threepio found it first. She opened the file to the ship's plumbing system, accessed the appropriate datalink, and sent Threepio to present it to Han. After his earlier response to the suggestion, she wanted to be nowhere in the vicinity when he received it. If he wanted to be a stubborn bulwhark, then he didn't have to look at it.

Was it a matter of pride? Why wouldn't someone want to look at the manual if they were stuck? It made no sense to her. She knew that she herself could sometimes be hot-headed and impulsive, but overall, she was fairly logical.

Han was far more impulsive than she. And when it came to his ship, she knew he could be fiercely defensive. Sometimes, when she saw the way he had rigged some of the systems, she was surprised it flew at all. But, Leia had to admit, the Falcon was one of the fastest ships she had ever seen. And after watching Han navigate through that asteroid field, she had a new respect for his piloting skills.

At first, she had thought perhaps he really was crazy. Even as he made his way through, it seemed insane. She had been genuinely frightened. But, once he had pulled into the "cave," she had to grudgingly admit, it had been a genius plan.

Had he been able to fix the hyperdrive, it would have worked perfectly. On the other hand, if it had worked perfectly, they would have arrived at the rendezvous point long before now. And, after that first kiss, Han would be gone. Now, she couldn't imagine not having this time together.

Leia smiled to herself and sifted through the ship's files. She came upon a file that was tagged "Music." It piqued her curiosity. What kind of music did Han Solo listen to? She opened the file and was mildly surprised at the diversity of Han' collection. There was a large content of songs she was unfamiliar with. But he had a good amount of popular songs that she recognized, and a surprising number of classics. There was definitely more to this man than met the eye.

Leia saw movement in the doorway, sensed it was Han, but remained fixed on the computer screen. Her irritation resurfaced and she did not acknowledge his presence until he spoke.

"Hey," he said in a subdued voice.

"Hey." Her eyes stayed straight ahead.

"I, uh, fixed the water recycler."

"Great." She made a show of examining something on the screen.

He was quiet and Leia wondered what more he expected.

He laughed self-consciously. "That file from the manual was real helpful. Thanks."

She wanted to fling a sarcastic retort at him but she decided to let him sweat it out. "No problem."

"Hey," he called lightly.

"Yeah?" She answered without turning.

"Can you look at me?"

She swiveled her chair to face him, expression blank. His body and clothes were filthy but she could see that he had scrubbed his hands clean. He placed his hands on his hips and pressed his lips together. Leia waited.

"Sorry about laughing about the manual idea," he finally sighed.

Leia's expression remained unchanged. "Okay." She turned back to face the computer station. She was pleased that he was able to come to the conclusion that he had acted like a jerk without her having to spell it out for him. But she would not make it easy for him.

"Leia, don't be like that," he implored.

"Like what?" she asked with an innocent air.

"Like _that_. All mad and everything," he clarified inarticulately.

She raised an eyebrow pointedly. "And everything?"

"You know what I mean." His discomfort was palpable.

"Yes," she agreed. "I know what you mean." She finally stood and met him head-on. "You know, it was bad enough you rejected a valid idea, and that you laughed at me." Her voice remained even. "But was it really necessary to call over Chewie so he could laugh at me too?" She crossed her arms over her chest.

His eyes were downcast for a moment before he looked up at her and responded. "You're right. I'm sorry." He paused. "You know, we weren't laughing at you. We were laughing at the idea."

Leia was pretty certain there was no difference. "Well," she countered hotly. "It didn't end up being that funny, after all, did it?"

"No." He looked down again. "Sorry." He met her eyes again and tried a tentative smile. "Thanks for finding the file. In spite of me acting like a…" he thought for a moment. "Bulwhark."

Leia was momentarily startled by his use of the word. She giggled slightly.

Han smiled. "Me being a bulwhark is funny?"

Now she laughed out loud, garnering a confused look from Han. "No, what's funny is that a bulwhark is exactly what I was calling you in my head." She laughed again.

He grinned and took her hand. "Well, that's better than a lot of other things you've called me." She laughed again and he leaned down to kiss her, careful not to touch her with the parts of his body that were not yet clean.

She kissed him back, glad the incident was over. "And you don't even know the things I've called you behind your back," she said playfully.

He looked askance at her. "You mean gorgeous? Brilliant? Best pilot in the galaxy?"

She wasn't going to let him know how close to the mark he was. His head was big enough already. "Mmm…something more along the lines of: stubborn, rude, and arrogant."

His brow lowered in disappointment but Leia could tell he was teasing. "Sweetheart, you wound me." He placed a hand over his heart."

She smiled sweetly. "I think your ego will survive."

He laughed low in his throat and it sent a chill through Leia. "I'm gonna go take a shower. Now that we have water."

He squeezed her hand and she smiled while she watched him walk away.


	11. Chapter 11: Music to my Ears

Happy Friday, everyone! The next post after this one will be what most of you have been waiting patiently for ;) Have a great weekend!

Freshly showered, Han sought Leia out and found her still sitting at the computer terminal. He watched her for a moment, unnoticed. He had a lot of time to think while in the shower, letting the lukewarm water drip down his body and lighten some of the stress in his muscles.

The ease with which they had resolved their latest conflict pleasantly surprised Han. They had spent so much time arguing, yelling, and insulting each other. They were both hot-tempered and had always brought out that quality in each other far too easily. And although he had to admit he had spent a lot of time baiting her, she had been the first to start them down an antagonistic path.

 _'_ _This is some rescue! When you came in here, didn't you have a plan for getting out?'_

He smiled at the memory. Her smart mouth had both pissed him off and attracted him. That moment had set the tone for the next three years. And after all the ups and downs between them, who knew things could ever be this easy?

She turned suddenly, as if sensing him in the doorway. She gave him a quizzical look. "What?"

He smiled. "Nothin'. Just looking."

She studied him a moment. "Mmm, you're thinking about something. I know that face."

He laughed shortly. "This is my thinking face?"

"It is," Leia declared.

He laughed again and ambled over to her, hands on his hips. He watched her stand to face him then he took her place in the chair and pulled her into his lap. He kissed her, sweet and long. When he pulled back to look at her, she stared back knowingly.

"That did not distract me."

He couldn't help but be amused. She was too much. "I must be losing my touch," he quipped. Defeated, he decided to explain his thoughts, something he usually tried to avoid. "I was thinking," he began, pulling her closer to avoid her eyes. "That, you know. We get along pretty good." He took her hand in his and began brushing his fingers across hers. "You know, we have these fights. And then we talk about it. And it's over." He shrugged. "It's pretty easy." When she didn't respond, Han looked up to find her smiling at him.

"That's a really good observation. Especially for such a scoundrel," she teased softly.

He smiled back, pleased that she had understood. "Well, we both can have pretty bad tempers…"

"You'd be surprised to know that I am usually very even-tempered."

He laughed loudly.

"I'm serious," she insisted. "Okay, yes, when I get angry, I get very angry."

"Oh, yes," he agreed.

She leveled him with a mock glare. "I don't normally get angry very often. You just…somehow have always brought out the worst in me."

"It's a special set of skills I have."

She rolled her eyes then softened her expression. "Well, I'm glad you found some new skills."

"Me, too," he leered and kissed her quickly before she could reply.

She continued without missing a beat. "I am trained in diplomacy, you know. And when I really care about someone, I would rather try to understand them than argue."

A warmth blossomed in Han's chest, taking him by surprise. He had known for a long time that Leia cared about him. But hearing it was something different. Hoping he did not look as affected by her words as he felt, Han attempted what he hoped was a smug smile. "You care about me?"

He saw the progression of her thoughts as her admission slowly dawned on her. Confusion…understanding…embarrassment. It happened very fast but Han could see all those emotions as they hit her. He found it endearing.

Her cheeks flared pink and Leia glanced down. "Well, yes, of course." She met his gaze again. "I've always cared about you," she said softly.

Her vulnerable expression touched him. "You've spent the past three years pretending not to care about me." His tone was light but beneath it were all the feelings that had been buried between them.

"You didn't make it easy." She matched his tone and volume.

He nodded. "Well, this tells me something."

"What?"

He grinned, dispelling the tender moment. "That everything I said back on Hoth was true."

She shook her head and sighed. "Not _everything_ ," she corrected.

"Let's see," he scratched his head, pretending to think about it. "I said you wanted me to stay cause of the way you felt about me. Was I wrong?"

Suddenly, the playfulness in Leia's expression clouded. Her brow knitted for a brief second before she looked away.

Han quickly realized it was not the best idea to bring up that incident. He wished for a way to take it back, a futile, childish desire.

They had not discussed the fact that he still had to leave since their departure from Hoth. Both had been pretending that particular reality did not exist. It was easy to do. They still had weeks before they reached Bespin. It felt endless. But it wasn't. And it would end with both of them hurt.

Leia looked back at him with a plaintive expression. Han did not know how to handle it. He had spent his entire life avoiding looks like that. And worst of all, there was nothing he could say to make either of them feel better. He didn't like this feeling, not one bit. He felt guilty and vulnerable, and he didn't know how to handle it.

He cleared his throat and looked at the computer. "Did you find any music you like?" He was very aware of the long pause before she answered.

"A few songs."

He looked at her and a spark of understanding flashed between them in an instant. He could see in her serious eyes that she was well aware of his discomfort, and his avoidance of the topic. She was letting the moment pass. And he was pretty sure that she knew he was aware of it. He offered a small smile, a silent thank you.

He turned back to the computer. "Which ones?"

"Well," she replied as if nothing had happened. "You have a lot of stuff I've never heard of."

"I'm not surprised."

"But you have some songs I use to love. Like this one." She pointed at the screen.

Han peered at the song and burst into laughter.

"What?" she asked defensively.

"Nothing. It's just…" He laughed more quietly this time. "When did you hear that song?"

"It was a long time ago. Maybe ten years ago?" She looked puzzled.

He laughed again. "Do you know what that song is about?"

She thought about it. "Yes. It's about success, reaching your goal."

Han laughed harder and slapped a knee.

She stood, clearly getting annoyed. "What?"

"Do you know the words?" When he received only a furrowed brow, Han turned to the terminal and brought the lyrics up on the screen. He pointed and Leia's eyes followed. "Touch my star? Make it explode?" he read aloud, then paused as she continued to read the words on the screen.

Understanding hit and she stood up straight, crossed her arms and covered her face with one hand.

Han laughed again. He loved when her cheeks flushed pink.

Abruptly, she threw her hands down and balled them into fists. "Well, how was I supposed to know? I was twelve!"

Somehow, the outburst amused Han even further but he tried to rein in his laughter. He grabbed her around the waist and pulled her to him. He smiled up at her and she fought not to return the smile but lost that battle. She ended up chuckling softly and wrapping her arms around his shoulders.

She pulled back and stuck a finger in his face. "But if you call Chewie over and tell him about this, I will kill you."

Han raised his hands defensively. "I wouldn't dare!"


	12. Chapter 12: Everything That Matters

The moment many have been waiting for...including Han and Leia lol. Hope you guys like it :) Thank you for reading!

Fingers intertwined with Han's, Leia snuggled into the crook of his arm.

"Just don't tell anyone we're sleeping together," Han drawled. "No, wait. What am I saying? Tell everyone."

Leia smiled and turned on her side to face him. When he first laid down next to her and settled in with the obvious intention of spending the night beside her again, she had felt a brief moment of unease. This was so new to her, such foreign territory. But, being the man he was, Han broke the tension and they fell into place…almost as if this was where they were supposed to be. But that was a silly, romantic notion and Leia dismissed it.

She watched him, eyes half closed, lips parted. Leia never knew that the sight of someone could stir such deep feelings in her. It felt like her chest was too full of feelings. How could she contain them?

She wondered what he felt. Clearly, he had feelings for her. But that afternoon, when she had inadvertently admitted that she cared about him…he had been very pleased. But he hadn't said the same in return. She felt silly thinking about it. Obviously he cared about her. Had she been paying better attention, she would have seen it sooner. He had always protected her, had always come to her rescue. At times, she had wondered why. She always chalked it up to obligation. If he was escorting her on a mission, he felt responsible for her.

But, in retrospect, Leia recognized the times when he seemed genuinely scared for her safety and that he often seemed greatly relieved to find her intact.

And that comment about the argument on Hoth. It had hit her hard, harder than she liked to admit. They had been avoiding any mention of him leaving. But it was there, lingering dismally in the not too distant future.

A dull ache settled in her stomach when she thought about it. Wasn't this why she never trusted him? Because he had no loyalty?

She dismissed the thought immediately. How could she possibly not trust him? He was stuck in this mess only because he went back for her on Hoth. In reality, he was one of the most loyal people she knew.

"You're very quiet." His voice seemed loud and severe in the stillness of the cabin.

She pushed all unpleasant thoughts aside. She could not go back. She could only go forward. "I guess I'm a little tired."

"We can go to sleep."

She was silent, gathering courage as she had been for days now. "Han?"

"Mm?"

"Where is your family home? Is it on Corellia?" She felt him tense beside her.

He sighed after a moment of silence. "Leia. I don't like to talk about family. Or Corellia."

"Why?" she asked patiently. "Why so secretive?"

"You wouldn't understand," he said quietly.

She raised herself up on her forearms and looked at him until he met her eyes.

"How do you know if you don't try?" she whispered.

He smiled wryly. "How could you understand? You're a Princess. You grew up in a palace."

"You're right, I did." She paused for effect. "But that's all gone now. And what am I left with?" She sat up. "I have nothing. And no one." It hurt to say it aloud. But, she wanted him to understand that they were not so different.

He glanced away, mouth locked in silence.

Leia placed a gentle hand on Han's cheek and turned him to face her. She kissed him softly then stared into his eyes. "Do you trust me?"

She saw the conflict in his eyes. She had never seen him so defenseless.

"Leia, it's not that simple."

"It is that simple," she reassured him.

"Why does it matter?"

"Because…I want to know you," Leia admitted. He let so little out.

"You already know everything about me that you need to know," he soothed.

"I know almost nothing about you."

"You know everything that matters. You know I've risked my life for you over and over and that I'd do it again," he said gruffly. "And you know I'm here with you right now because of that. That's all you need to know."

She nodded. "Yes, I know you're stuck here with me because of that." Her voice began to rise and she struggled to keep it under control. "And I know that if you weren't, you would've escaped before the Empire had a shot at you."

He grabbed her hands. "Is that what you think?" he asked, surprised. "That I'm stuck with you?"

She looked down at his hands clasping hers. How did this conversation even get to this place? She lowered her voice. "Not that you're stuck with _me._ But that you're stuck in this situation because of me. Because you risked your life for me. Again."

"Leia," he said levelly. "I am not stuck." He laughed harshly. "Didn't you hear what I said? I'd do it again. As many times as I had to. I had to go back for you at the Command Center. I couldn't take the thought of anything happening to you."

She stared at him, unable to speak. She felt near tears.

As he bent to kiss her, he whispered, "That's all you need to know."

And then he was kissing her roughly, pulling her close. He leaned back and pulled her on top of him. Finally, he tore his mouth away and leaned his forehead against hers. He was breathing harshly, eyes closed.

In that moment, Leia knew she loved him. And she knew she wanted him. She had been holding back, waiting to give herself to him physically until she knew he loved her. But he cared about her, he had proven it countless times without saying a word. So maybe that was enough.

She sat back and he looked at her. His eyes were vulnerable and it touched her to the core. Without breaking his stare, Leia took his hand in her palm and slowly placed it inside her shirt, on her breast. She shivered at the intimate contact. "Touch me," she whispered in an unfamiliar, husky voice.

Han closed his eyes, swallowed, and when he looked at her again, his expression was pained. "Leia, are you sure about this?"

"So sure," she whispered. For a moment he just stared at her, unmoving. Then, very slowly, his palm grazed her nipple and Leia's breath caught in shocked pleasure. She felt her nipple go rigid and her head fell back as she was lost in the feeling. She never knew anything could feel so blissful.

His hand cupped her breast through the neckline of her shirt and her nipple was covered in the wet warmth of Han's mouth. Leia forgot to breathe

Han's mouth erased the galaxy around them as he coaxed soft, throaty sounds of delight from her. He pulled back gently and Leia could see the desire in his hooded eyes. She caressed the smooth skin of his chest. She reached for the bottom of her shirt, pulled it over her head and tossed it to the floor. She wanted his skin against hers.

"I want to feel you," she whispered. She laid back on the bunk and pushed the shorts off to join the shirt on the floor. She expected to feel shy or self-conscious. But when Han's eyes took in her naked body, his smoldering look made her feel beautiful.

His hand travelled slowly from the soft skin of her neck, down between her breasts, and across her stomach. Urgently, he moved over her and covered her body with his. Leia shuddered at the feel of Han's weight pressing down on her, his skin fused with hers. He kissed her fervently, tongue thrusting against hers. His mouth slowly explored her neck, shoulders, breasts, the tender flesh behind her ear. His hands seemed to be everywhere at once, gracefully skimming her body.

A soft, feathery touch between her legs and Leia's body tensed, unable to take the excruciating pleasure. He continued stroking her, his touch growing bolder. She gave a shuddering sigh and Han groaned, low in his throat. He pulled himself up to look at her, his hand still causing her to throb and writhe under him. She opened her eyes and found his piercing stare burning into her. Eyes fixed on each other, they shared a moment of startling intensity that wrenched her heart with both agony and ecstasy.

Leia realized that she wanted to give Han as much pleasure as he was giving her. She turned slightly and tugged lightly at the fastening of his pants. "Why am I the only one not wearing any clothes?" she breathed against his lips.

Han shook his head with a grin as he began to unfasten his pants. "You keep surprising me, Sweetheart."

When his pants were open, Leia helped him push them off. She suddenly realized that she really did not know what to do and her nerves finally kicked in.

Han must have seen it in her face. He tapped her chin gently. "Are you okay?"

She felt her cheeks burning and was thankful for the dim lighting. She averted her eyes. "Yes, I…I just…"

"Shhh," he soothed. He laid down next to her, turned to face her and began kissing her, his hands running softly over her body.

Slowly, she began to relax again. She stroked his shoulders, his back, then gradually lowered her hands to caress the backs of his thighs. He was moaning softly into her mouth. Feeling more confident, Leia pressed herself against him. He felt harder and smoother than she expected. She reached between them and touched him lightly. Han's harsh breathing encouraged her and she brushed her hand more fully against him.

"Leia!" he gasped, eyes closed tightly. He grabbed her hand, turned, and moved over her. He leaned on his forearms, hands cradling her face. He looked into her eyes. "I want you," he whispered earnestly, his voice seeming to throb through her.

Leia nodded, never leaving his stare. He kissed her, gently at first, then with growing passion. He lowered his body to hers and Leia bent her hips to meet him. Han groaned and broke the kiss, his breathing harsh against her lips. His hand went between them, he slipped one finger slowly inside her and Leia could feel the wet, slick evidence of her desire. As his finger slid in and out in a steady rhythm, ripples of ecstasy flew through her.

Suddenly, he placed his lower body between her legs and she felt him guiding himself into her. He moved very slowly and Leia's breathing intensified. She felt an odd stretching inside and she wanted _more_. She was surprised by how big he felt inside her. When he haltingly pushed deeper, Leia began to feel a slight pain. She froze and Han stilled his movement.

"Are you okay? Am I hurting you?" His voice was almost a growl.

Leia had known that it would hurt. And she didn't want to stop. She wanted this. "Just a little," she admitted. "But I'm okay."

Han exhaled harshly, eyes squeezed shut. He looked like he was the one in pain.

"It's okay," Leia assured him. She took his face in her hands. "Make love to me, Han," she whispered.

He kissed her longingly on the mouth then returned his tongue to her neck, licking and teasing. He began to move inside her, very slowly, pushing a tiny bit deeper with each thrust.

The bout of pain was overshadowed by a slow, erotic throb that pulsed through her. Han's rhythm increased and Leia followed her instincts and began jerking her hips to meet his thrusts.

Han growled low in his throat and began to move faster, plunging more deeply inside her. Leia was overwhelmed by an urgent fire, reaching towards an unfamiliar precipice. Just when she thought he couldn't get any deeper inside her, he pushed faster and harder and Leia felt something bursting inside as Han suddenly immersed himself within her heat, shuddering and gasping. She was overcome by a frenzied throb that quickly turned to a paroxysm of ecstasy that shook her entire body. Time stopped, reality disappeared. Leia was aware of nothing but the trembling of her body answering the entirety of Han inside her. Her breath shook in tme to the shudders of her body and as the tremors lessened, she began to come back to herself and the haze surrounding them slowly turned solid and stable again.

Wearily, Han put his arms around Leia and rolled sideways, keeping her close. Leia felt weak, depleted, overwhelmed with emotion. They lay together, catching their breath. She felt him kiss the top of her head. She thought to tell him she loved him but was too spent to form words.


	13. Chapter 13: Peace at Last

TGIF! Thank you for all the support :)

Leia woke, momentarily disoriented. She realized that Han's naked body was tangled around her own and the memories of their love making flooded her mind.

She had never felt so close to another human being, hadn't even known she could feel such an intense, emotional connection. It seemed as if he could see inside her soul when he looked in her eyes.

She had often wondered why everyone made such a big deal about sex. Now she knew very well why. Was it always like this? Or was Han especially good at it?

She didn't want to love him. She couldn't deny that she did and the realization had felt wonderful and beautiful in the moment. But now it only made her think about him leaving. It had been hard enough saying goodbye to him on Hoth, when most of their interactions were hostile. Perhaps she had loved him even then. In an odd way, it felt as if she had always loved him. Since she met him, he had always been a part of her circle, along with Luke and Chewie. At first, it had been grudgingly. He somehow came with Luke, as if they were a set. Most of the time, she hadn't even wanted him around. He often just showed up, and Leia would sigh with frustration. And then, he had been the only pilot working with the Alliance who did not find her intimidating. So, she had been stuck with him on many missions, whether she liked it or not. Sometimes, she liked it very much…perhaps a bit too much. Other times, she wanted to kill him.

But she never would have denied his skill as a pilot, or the fact that he would do anything, no matter how crazy or dangerous, to protect her and the mission. These were convenient reasons to accept him as her pilot.

And somehow, through all of this, they managed a tenuous friendship. Attraction aside, Han had become important to her, had become one of the very few beings that truly mattered to her. When he had almost died on Nimbla IV, it had really hit her how much she had come to rely on his presence in her life.

And now, she was in love with him. How could she possibly say goodbye and watch him fade into the distance?

Here with Han, for the first time in three years, Leia didn't feel alone. It was amazing what that did for her soul. She almost felt whole again. Losing everyone and everything she ever loved had been crushing. She had resigned herself to being alone and giving her life to the Rebellion. She hadn't thought there would be anything else for her. Now, Han made her want more.

She wasn't even sure what exactly she wanted. The idea of marriage and family seemed absurd. She was, essentially, living as an outlaw. She was on the right side of justice, but what life was this? This was not a normal life in which Leia could think about a real future.

And what could she expect from Han? Even without the bounty hanging over his head, how long would a man like Han Solo stay in one place? He had always made it known that he preferred to stay clear of entanglements.

Yet, here they were, entangled.

The most she could ever expect from him would be to fight by her side. But this was not his fight, so she could not even expect that. He never hesitated to remind her, and anyone else who might be listening, that he was not a member of the Rebellion, and never would be. She had held that against him. Now, although she wished it were not the case, he had no choice but to finally address the debt that had been hanging over him like the dark thunder clouds of Kamino.

He stirred beside her and Leia was thankful to have her attention pulled from the dismal thoughts roaming through her mind. He sighed quietly through his nose then his eyes slowly opened. He blinked a few times before his eyes settled on Leia.

He smiled, eyes half-closed, and pulled Leia closer. "What time is it?" he mumbled.

Leia pulled back slightly to look at the chrono. "Four hundred seventeen." She returned to his embrace.

"Oh, good," he muttered. "We can stay like this for a few more hours." He made a deep, low sound of contentment and held her more tightly. "You feel so good right here."

Leia had never felt so at peace. "I wish we could stay like this…" _forever_ , she added silently, feeling too foolish to say it aloud.

"Sounds good to me," he murmured. He shifted to look at her "Are you sore?" he asked carefully.

Leia could hear the concern in his voice and it touched her. "Not anymore, I'm okay." She looked up at him and smiled. "Great, actually."

He kissed her softly. "I hate that I hurt you."

"Please don't feel badly about it. Doesn't the first time always hurt?"

"That's what I hear," he answered in a stilted tone.

Leia stroked his cheek and smiled. "So don't dwell on it. It was…" she floundered for an adequate word. She didn't want to say anything overly corny or dramatic. This was Han. "Wonderful," she finally settled on.

He nodded but his expression was still troubled.

Leia moved to lay on top of him and kissed him, pressing her hips against his. "Does the second time hurt too?" she asked seductively. She was happy to see his frown slowly turn to a smile.

"I don't know but we can certainly find out." Han kissed her forcefully but his touch was gentle when he spun her to her back.


	14. Chapter 14: Confessions

Leia watched Han pull on his pants then reach for his shirt. "Just stay in bed," Han directed. "You didn't get much sleep."

Leia smiled back from her place on the pillow. "Neither did you."

He shrugged into his shirt and fastened it while still looking at Leia. "Yeah, but I have to check readings and work on some repairs."

"I can work on repairs too," she offered.

He sat next to her on the bed and kissed her forehead. "I know you can. And you will. But get some rest." He smiled that mischievous lopsided grin that had always infuriated her. Now she found it endearing. "Save your energy for later." He winked.

Leia put her arms around his shoulders and pulled him down into a long, languid kiss. When it ended, Han looked at her with a raised brow.

"Isn't this how I ended up staying in bed so long to begin with? I must be really good, I've made you insatiable," he teased.

Leia laughed softly. "Well, I don't have anything to compare to, but I'm not complaining."

"Not complaining? I'm flattered," he said dryly. He kissed her quickly, stood, and tucked his shirt into his pants. "I'll see you in a little while."

"Okay," she called softly.

He turned, palmed open the door, then lingered a moment in the doorway. His mouth was set in a grim expression as he stood, half-turned to leave. Leia watched him curiously.

"Leia," he finally said awkwardly.

"Yes?"

Eyes on the floor, he said in a casual tone, "I don't have any family. I grew up in a boys' shelter." He glanced at her quickly and before she could respond, he was gone.

Leia's heart broke and she melted a little more inside.

###

Han sat in his captain's chair, the spot he always went when he needed to think. Gazing out at the stars always brought him peace and helped him clarify things.

He was not normally the introspective type but he couldn't ignore his feelings. He had decided a long time ago that emotional entanglements were not worth the trouble. Women made no sense and were too much work. It was best to keep any romantic affairs casual. But Leia…

She had completely taken him by surprise. She elicited a tenderness in him that he had never felt before. The urge to protect her was fierce. He thought back to Ord Mantell. At the beginning of the mission he had admitted to Leia that he was going to stay on with the Rebellion indefinitely. But then Leia's life had been in danger, all because of his debt…he decided instantly that he had to get the Falcon in tip-top shape and go settle that score. He simply couldn't take the thought of Leia coming to harm because of him.

But, here they were, and thanks to his disagreeable ship, she might still come to harm. He had saved her from being captured by the Imps on Hoth. He hoped this would turn out better.

His biggest fear was not getting her to safety. At the rate the Falcon was creeping towards Bespin, so many things could go wrong. He would feel better once they arrived and were able to get repairs started.

He didn't know what had possessed him to tell Leia about where he grew up. Even Chewie didn't know.

' _Do you trust me?'_

Had she asked him that question a couple of weeks ago he would have tossed back a snide remark. But he realized he had always trusted her. She and Luke were the most loyal, noble beings Han had ever known. And they had both always had his back.

It wasn't so much a matter of trust. When he left Corellia behind, he abandoned that part of himself. He didn't like to think about it, much less talk about it.

But it had seemed so important to her to know. He almost walked away without a word. But something had compelled him, at the last second, to tell her. What that something was, he was not certain. Then he fled before Leia had a chance to say anything.

He spun his seat around, facing the cockpit door. He wondered if she was still in bed. He had been away from her for, what? Forty standard time-parts? And he _missed_ her. Han Solo couldn't remember ever really missing anyone.

How the hell was he going to drop her at the Fleet and take off?


	15. Chapter 15: Disquietude

Happy Friday! Hope you enjoy this chapter :) Thank you for not getting bored of this story, cause I am lol.

Leia stood under the spray of the shower, eyes closed, thinking about Han as the water saturated her hair.

His admission had profoundly affected her. She felt honored that he trusted her enough to share a part of his past with her. And she felt she finally understood a big part of who Han Solo was.

She had wanted to run after him, take him in her arms, and hold him. But she knew he didn't want that. Which was why he had told her as he walked out the door. So she had stayed in place, eyes brimming with tears, heart torn over the life he must have led.

No wonder he didn't trust anyone and was such a loner. He hid his heart behind an uncaring, arrogant façade. He had allowed her to glimpse through the tough mask a few times in the past. But just when she would start to suspect that there was a caring man underneath all the bluster, he would inevitably shroud himself in his usual, impenetrable cocoon.

But his softer side turned out to be…lovely. It was the only word to describe it. She smiled softly to herself, imagining his expression if she were to tell him she found him lovely. She never expected him to be so gentle and caring. He was surprisingly considerate.

She thought back to when they first met. He had been like a little boy, pulling a girl's hair to get her attention. She could see it now, in retrospect. But being on the other end of that treatment had been maddening.

She wished she had known. All this time, she denied the attraction, thinking Han was more mercenary than anything else. So much time, wasted. And here they were, almost at the end of things for them. They had both been so stubborn. Leia's heart felt heavy.

The swish of the refresher door interrupted her thoughts. Startled, Leia called out. "Han?" He didn't answer, but she could make out his form through the opaque shower door. She could see he was shedding his clothes but she was still unprepared when he pulled back the door to the shower and stepped inside, naked. She felt an absurd urge to cover herself. "What are you doing?" she asked, feeling suddenly awkward in the small space.

"Taking a shower," he replied with an innocent air.

Before she could form a response, Han took her in his arms, kissed her with a rising fervor, then lifted her up and pushed her back to the cold, hard shower wall. Leia stopped thinking when he pressed inside her.

###

Leia felt so blissfully content resting against Han's bare chest. It was as if she didn't have a care in the galaxy. At the moment, she was willing to exist in that delusion.

"Han?" she whispered. She wanted to share something with him, as he had shared a part of his past with her.

"Mmm?"

She hesitated a brief moment. "I want to tell you something that no one knows about me."

"What? That you're not a virgin anymore?" He chuckled, thoroughly amused by his own joke.

Leia rolled her eyes. "I'm being serious," she snapped more harshly than intended.

He quieted instantly. "Okay, sorry. I'll be serious. What did you want to tell me?"

She wasn't sure if she detected some anxiety in his tone. "I'm not a princess by birth," she confessed. "I'm adopted."

He was silent, and Leia wondered what he was thinking.

"Hm," he finally replied. "Why is it a secret?"

"When it comes to royalty, bloodlines are everything," she explained. "I would have been viewed as not being a real princess had anyone known." She paused, a dull grief welling in her chest. "I guess it doesn't really matter anymore though."

Han said nothing, just held her more tightly.

She looked at him in sudden realization, eyes large and sad. "We both have no family," she said with soft wonder. "We're both alone now."

For a second, there was naked, raw emotion in Han's eyes. His mouth opened and closed in a heartbeat before he covered his reaction with a stoic expression. He nodded in acknowledgement then kissed Leia's forehead. She leaned back on his shoulder.

His voice was deep and low when he spoke. "You know, it didn't hit me until Yavin that you'd lost everything. There was so much going on and you were so…" He paused, thinking. "So tough. So determined. I knew you were a Princess, but then it hit me. You were the Princess from _Alderaan."_ He emitted a sound of disbelief.

Leia felt too shaky to speak. She never talked about the loss of her entire world. It was too much to articulate.

"You'd just lost your whole planet," Han continued in a soft, gruff voice. "How were you even standing?"

Leia fought the tears that threatened. Every time she thought she had this under control, something forced her to face the fact that she hadn't gotten over the loss. "I don't know. It was easier not to think about it. I don't think I processed it all until much later." She sighed. "Even though I saw it happen."

"You _saw it_?" Han's voice rose in the quiet cabin.

"Yes," Leia admitted in a hoarse whisper. "Tarkin had me at the viewport when they fired on Alderaan."

Han's embrace tightened around her and Leia felt a tear spill and roll down her cheek. She was glad that Han could not see her face. She didn't allow herself to cry in front of anyone, if she could help it. She had slipped a few times in the past with Han. She would prefer not to do it again.

"I admired the hell out of you for the way you handled it."

Leia smiled through her tears. "You know more than anyone that I don't always handle it so well." In a moment of weakness, she had confided in him a long time ago about her nightmares.

Han shrugged. "Most people couldn't handle it at all. An occasional nightmare is nothing."

"In the beginning, it was more than occasional," she confessed in a hushed tone.

"Princess," he whispered into her hair. For the first time, her formal title sounded like an endearment on his lips. "You are stronger than anyone I've ever known."

Leia didn't trust her voice so she took his hand and kissed it, a silent thank you. In that moment, she didn't feel strong. She felt open and defenseless, something she was not use to feeling. She had been closed off for three years, maintaining a tough front. She never let anyone see past the cloak she wore so well. It suddenly occurred to her that she and Han were not so different. How had she not seen this before?

 _I love you,_ she thought, the words resounding in her head.

In typical Han Solo fashion, he shattered the tender moment. "Don't get me wrong, I could barely stand you at first," he said in a more conversational tone.

Leia couldn't help but smile. "The feeling was quite mutual," she replied dryly.

Han laughed. "You were so bossy and tough. Not the delicate, proper Princess I expected when Luke told me we were going to rescue you." His voice was laced with affection.

"Had you met me in a different situation, you might have thought otherwise."

"Sweetheart," he rumbled. "I would never have met you in any other situation."

"You don't know that."

He snorted derisively. "Yes, I do know that."

"Why do you say that?"

He shifted to look at her. "How else would I have met you?" His voice had taken on a hard edge. "We didn't exactly travel in the same circles."

Leia averted her eyes, realizing the truth in his statement.

"And anyway, you wouldn't have given me the time of day in any other time and place."

She looked up at him. "Now that's not true," she protested.

"Isn't it?" he sneered. "Come on. Are you saying that if we met some other way, you would've invited me over to the palace for a cup of kaffe?"

Leia felt her cheeks redden as she realized he was completely right. Han settled back on the pillow and she leaned against him.

"You know," she began quietly, "just because that wouldn't have happened, it doesn't mean anything."

"Huh?"

"What I mean is, I was always busy with the Senate, and then working as a spy for the Rebellion. I didn't have time to socialize. So, no, I wouldn't have invited you for kaffe. But I didn't invite anyone for kaffe."

His lack of response disturbed her. "For what it's worth," she added, "I'm glad I'm here with you. In spite of the danger." Han was quiet and she wondered if he believed her. He had to know that she wouldn't say such a thing if it were not true.

Han's voice finally broke the silence, loud and toneless. "Well, this is where we are and we don't have a choice. So I guess it doesn't really matter." He turned on his side, slung an arm around Leia's waist and closed his eyes. "G'night, Princess."

Leia's stomach churned with disquietude. For the first time since this trip had begun she felt as if a blast door had just closed between them. A blast door that had taken three years to open. She watched Han's blank expression for a moment then gave him a quick kiss on the lips. "Good night, Han," she whispered.

She snuggled into his warmth. After a long moment, his arms tightened around her and she felt a mild sense of comfort and reli


	16. Chapter 16: Afterthoughts

Leia stretched and left the bed. Han was pulling his shirt down over his head. She picked up her coldsuit from nearby, but before she realized what he was doing, Han grabbed it from her and held it up with disgust.

"I can't look at this thing anymore," he growled. Without looking away from Leia, he tossed it onto the closet floor with a flourish.

She placed her hands on her hips. "Well, what am I supposed to wear?"

He gestured for her to wait, turned to the closet and began rifling through his storage compartments. He came away with a long, light blue shirt.

"That's huge, Han."

He handed it to her. "Just put it on."

Leia exhaled in frustration but pulled the shirt on and looked down at the hem, which reached past her knees. Palms up, she gave Han a look of disdain.

He nodded, turned to the desk against the wall, and retrieved a small multi-tool. He flipped open a cutter, stepped close to Leia and grabbed the fabric at the bottom of the shirt.

Leia watched as he began steadily cutting a length of the shirt away. He cut around the entire bottom with surprising precision then stepped back to admire his handiwork.

Now Leia was wearing an absurdly large shirt that ended just past her waist. She dangled her arms in the very long sleeves.

"I feel ridiculous," she told him.

"I'm not done yet." He moved closer to her, took the two sides of the shirt's bottom, pulled them out and tied them together at her waist. Before Leia could comment, Han pulled one sleeve all the way down, cut off a long portion of it then rolled the remaining sleeve to her mid upper-arm. He turned her around by the shoulders and repeated the process with the other sleeve.

"There," Han exclaimed. "Put on those sleep short and you're good." He grinned. "You haven't been sleeping in them anyway."

Leia looked down at herself. The shirt actually looked okay. Impressed, she smiled up at him. "Nice job," she praised. "But you ruined your poor shirt."

Han shrugged. "I haven't worn it since I dunno know when. It's no big deal." He turned, tossed some things aside and came away with the sleep shorts. "Here." He handed them to her.

She slipped them on then stood with her hands on her hips.

Han appraised her with a smile. "Much better."

She returned his smile and gave him a quick kiss. "Thank you. This is much more comfortable."

He moved to exit the cabin, still smiling, then suddenly turned back, sharp concern in his eyes. "Leia," he said urgently. "When's the last time you had a shot?"

For a moment, Leia stared dumbly, with no idea what Han was talking about. Then it hit her, as sudden as a meteor shower. He was talking about birth control. She realized she hadn't given it the slightest thought. From the fear in Han's eyes, he hadn't either.

"Isn't it a little late to ask that now?" she asked, mildly irritated.

Han offered her an apologetic look.

She crossed her arms and replied stiffly, "Four years ago. So it's good for one more year."

Han sighed with relief, which only annoyed Leia further. Sheepishly, he walked to her and put his arms around her. Leia remained unyielding.

"I realized I hadn't thought about it," he explained. "Normally I would assume…but since you've been with the Alliance, it occurred to me you might be overdue."

She nodded, eyes on his chest. Han pulled her closer and stroked her hair. "You're mad at me." Leia heard his voice over her head. "Why?"

Leia's thoughts were muddled. She wasn't sure why she was upset. The last thing in the galaxy she wanted was to get pregnant.

"Hmm?" he implored softly. "Why are you upset?"

Leia remained quiet, examining her feelings. He had asked a logical question and she knew her response was unwarranted. Was this the way it normally went when involved in a romantic affair? Hurt feelings over the slightest things? Extreme, unexplainable emotions? She wished she had someone she could confide in. She suddenly missed her mother with a sting she hadn't felt in a while. Her options on this journey were a Wookiee and a protocol droid, both of whom Leia was certain knew very little about human, romantic relations.

She felt embarrassed but pulled back and forced herself to face him. "I'm sorry. I don't know why I got upset. You didn't say anything wrong."

Han eyed her carefully and Leia dropped her eyes. "There must be a reason," he replied.

Leia paused, the words to express her feelings finally coalescing into some semblance of comprehension. Slowly, she began to explain. "The question made me…it made me feel…like what's happened between us is so…" she struggled for a word. "Casual." The admission made her feel uneasy, as if she were imposing upon them more gravity than he might feel. Part of her dismissed this idea as silly, but another part caused nerves to flutter through her stomach. She averted her eyes.

Han nodded. "Okay," he began slowly, thinking. "Look, I was just being practical. Like I said, normally I just assume."

The other piece fell into place and Leia was able to pinpoint her discomfort. ' _Normally I just assume.'_

This was all commonplace for him. To her, this was an unparalleled experience. Her feelings ran so deep. Sleeping with Han had been huge for her, something special she shared with him. To him, however, it was something he had done many times, she imagined with countless women. But she couldn't possibly tell him that. So she nodded impassively. "I know," she finally answered. "It's okay."

Han looked unconvinced. "Are you sure?"

Leia faked a smile. "Yes, I'm sure."

He studied her. His expression was skeptical. "So we're okay?" He gestured between them.

Leia nodded.

Han's mouth quirked to one side. "Why don't I believe you?"

Leia's small smile was genuine this time. Had he always been able to read her so well? She guessed that was how he had known her feelings even before she did. "We're fine," she said sweetly, hoping to allay his concerns.

He nodded, still looking doubtful, then leaned down to kiss her lingeringly. When he started to pull away, Leia grabbed his arm and beckoned him back for one last, quick kiss, bringing a smile to his lips before he turned and left the cabin.


	17. Chapter 17: A Kiss is Just A Kiss

Friday the 13th! Beware! LOL. Have a great weekend, everyone :)

From his place in the circuitry hold, Han spotted Leia approaching from the port-side corridor. In his modified shirt, cinched sleep shorts, and socks, she looked adorable. She was hugging herself, clearly cold. He frowned and stepped out to meet her.

"Why didn't you tell me you were cold? I'll go tell Threepio to raise the temperature back up." He started to walk away.

Leia grabbed his hand. "I'll tell him, don't worry," she dismissed. "I finished replacing the power cells. Now what can I do?"

Han was impressed. "That was quick."

"It wasn't complicated. Now what?"

"Go tell Threepio to raise the temperature."

"And then?"

Han shrugged. "There's nothing else for you to do today."

Leia sighed, looking dissatisfied. "Are you hungry?"

"I could eat."

She touched his arm in an affectionate gesture. "I'll get us something to eat."

"You're going to make something?" Han asked in disbelief. The only one on board who knew his way around the galley was Chewbacca.

Leia gave him a stern look. "I'm just going to heat up two packs of noodles."

"Okay," Han said, suppressing a grin. "You can probably handle that."

Leia tossed him a mock glare and headed for the galley.

He called after her. "I'll finish this up and be right there!" He capped the last two wires, carefully replaced the stabilizer, and closed the compartment. All the lights were lit and Han was satisfied. He tossed the tools aside and headed to the refresher to wash up.

He met Chewie in the corridor on his way to the galley. His furry co-pilot carried a large bowl of meat and vegetables.

"Where you going? We're just about to eat too."

Chewie barked a reply.

Han waved his concerns away. "Nah, come on. You're not getting in the way." How much time alone did they really need?

Chewie patted him gently on the shoulder and reminded Han that after Bespin they would rendezvous with the fleet and then that was it. They had to go.

Han grimaced, a sour feeling settling in his stomach. "I know," he replied gruffly.

The Wookiee wailed softly in sympathy. He patted Han's head and strode in the direction of his cabin.

Mood slightly dimmed, Han didn't find Leia in the galley, so he checked the crew lounge. She sat at the game table with a bowl and drink for each of them.

She smiled at him when he joined her at the table. He smiled back, trying to push out thoughts of the future.

"Thanks," he said simply.

"It wasn't a big deal."

"Of course, it wasn't. Or you wouldn't have been able to do it," he teased.

She leveled her fork at him. "You're not much better in the galley."

He grinned. "Never said I was, Sweetheart."

They ate the bland noodles in silence. Leia ate half of hers and gave the rest to Han. As Han finished eating, he became aware that Leia was watching him curiously. He sat back and looked at her. "What?"

She shook her head with a wistful expression. "I was just thinking."

Han had a feeling he was going to regret his next question. "About what?"

"Back on Hoth," she said thoughtfully. "You were so sure I had feelings for you. So sure that it was infuriating." She smiled a crooked smile that reminded Han quite a bit of himself. "How did you know?"

Han suppressed the urge to roll his eyes. Why did women always want to talk about everything? He sat back and thought about it. "I had a feeling here and there over the years, but I thought maybe it was my imagination." He paused, recalling their last mission before they arrived at Echo Base. "But on Ord Mantell. That was when I was pretty sure."

Leia was pensive. She tilted her head and looked at him. "How did you know?" she repeated. "I don't think _I_ even knew."

"You didn't want to know it," he said quietly. "I almost kissed you, you know. That night on the beach. When I picked you up."

"Oh, so I didn't imagine that!"

"What?"

"The way you looked at me."

Han smiled and took her hand across the table. "How did I look at you?"

Leia looked off into the distance, as if she were trying to remember. "It's hard to explain. You held me so close. And you looked at me and your eyes were so serious. I felt like you were looking inside me. And I liked it, but it scared me at the same time."

Han watched the dreamy expression on Leia's face start to fade as she came back to the present. "I couldn't handle it," she admitted.

"That's why you got so mad at me when you almost fell?" He smiled knowingly.

She shrugged sheepishly. "I couldn't handle it," she repeated. "So I did what I always did when you affected me too much. I lashed out at you."

He began to gently stroke her fingers. "I caught you staring at me a lot on that mission. That's part of what got me thinking." He grinned. "At first I thought it was just that I was so gorgeous, you couldn't help looking." He smiled smugly, enjoying the derisive eye-roll he earned from Leia. "But then that night…when I pulled you down to me on the sand. You kinda looked like you felt the same way I did right then."

"How did you feel right then?" she asked softly.

"Like I wanted to kiss you," he answered truthfully.

Her smile was tender. "I don't think I knew what I wanted," she said thoughtfully. "I was scared of how good it felt to be in your arms. I didn't want to feel that way. Not with you."

Her words stung slightly and he winced before he could stop himself.

She caught it immediately. "Han, don't take it that way."

He sniffed and forced a shrug. "What way?"

"Like it was an insult." She squeezed his hand.

He shrugged again. "I'm not insulted." He kept his face impassive as Leia scrutinized him.

"I felt that way because you acted like you didn't care about anything. Or anyone. And you always talked about leaving."

"Yeah, but I just told you I was staying."

"True," she admitted. "But I didn't want to admit to myself that hearing you say that brought me such a sense of relief. Like I wasn't going to lose another person from my life." She stared at the floor, her eyes troubled.

It wrenched Han's heart. He sought to lighten the mood. "By the time we reached Hoth you were itching to get away from me," he said lightly. "You lowered the ramp before I even brought the Falcon down."

He was pleased to receive a mock glare. "I thought about it. I also thought about tossing you out the top hatch."

He smirked.

"But when I heard you tell General Rieekan you were leaving…" Leia looked down and shook her head. "I was surprised by how much it upset me." When she returned her gaze to Han, she was smiling a bit too sweetly. "But you remedied that with your usual charm."

Han chuckled. "Yeah, I really got under your skin in the south passage. I figured I was outta there, so what did I have to lose? So I finally said what was on my mind."

"In the worst way possible," Leia countered. "Did you really think that was the way to win me over?" She raised a knowing eyebrow.

"Well, in the end, it worked, right?" He flashed his most charming grin.

"That was not what worked!"

"We're here now, aren't we?"

She shook her head and rolled her eyes. "Yes, after three years," she countered.

"Hey, you were slow to come around."

Her smile was strained. "That's because you were obnoxious."

Han gave her his best innocent look. "Who, me?"

She stared at him for a moment. Han waited, knowing it would go one of two ways. Finally, Leia chuckled softy to herself. "You're an impossible man." Han was relieved that her voice was laced with affection.

"Yeah, but you like me this way."

She gave him a sideways glance and he decided not to test his luck. "You were really pushing it to the limit on Hoth," Leia told him.

"Well, I stuck around for three years hoping for something that never happened. And after all we'd been through, I was leaving and you acted like you didn't give a damn."

When he looked at Leia, he saw that her eyes had gone large and liquid. He wasn't sure what he had just said to garner such a reaction.

She smiled tenderly. "You stayed because of me?"

Han's words came back to him and he felt suddenly awkward. "I can't say it was only because of you. But, yeah, you did have something to do with it," he conceded. She was still smiling at him and he found himself smiling back. "Apparently, I was using the wrong approach all this time."

"Yes," she said dryly. "You were going with scoundrel with a hint of nice guy. You should've gone with nice guy with a hint of scoundrel."

They laughed together and Han felt himself slipping further away into unfamiliar emotional territory. It was both exhilarating and terrifying. Like the first time he stole a speeder bike and raced it through the streets of Corellia.

"So, on the way to Ord Mantell when you told me you were staying. Were you just telling me that to see if it would get you anywhere with me?"

Han couldn't tell if she was amused or irritated at the thought. "Of course not," he replied defensively. "I've never had to lie to make time with a woman."

She raised her eyebrows. "Then why did you tell me that?

"Cause that was what I'd decided. I was going to stay. But that bounty hunter ruined my plans," he said sourly.

Leia sobered at the memory. Han watched her expression flicker and felt a pang of regret. He saw her visibly shrug it off.

"You know, you could have just tried being nice all this time," she chided softly. "You did admit to me that you're a nice man."

He lowered his eyebrows in mock confusion. "I must've been drunk at the time."

Leia laughed softly. She stood and sat on Han's lap, placing her arms around his shoulders. He held her tightly about the waist and he gazed up at her tender smile.

She smiled and shook her head. "If anyone had told me the first time we met that you would be the first man I kiss…" She laughed softly. "I would've sent them for a cranial scan."

Han's mind immediately flashed to watching Leia lean over Luke's bed in the medical unit at Echo Base and kiss him firmly on the lips. He vividly recalled the sick feeling in his stomach as he watched that display. "Whoa, wait a minute. I am not the first man you kissed."

Leia looked at him questioningly and Han couldn't believe she didn't know what he was referring to.

"Uhh, Hoth?" He tried to jog her memory. Still no reaction. "The med unit? Luke?" His tone was incredulous.

In a flash, Leia's mouth dropped open. Her face burned bright red and she placed a hand over her eyes. "Oh my gods."

Han wasn't sure what to think. " _Now_ you're embarrassed?"

Her hand dropped from her eyes but she stared at the floor. "I completely forgot I did that."

Han's brow rose in disbelief. "I wish I could forget it."

Leia sighed and looked sheepishly at Han. "That was a stupid thing I did. For so many reasons."

"How could you forget that?"

She grimaced. "I don't know. At the time, I was so angry with you. _So angry._ After the way you embarrassed me, the things you said." She sighed. "I wanted to prove you wrong. Make you look and feel stupid."

Han nodded. "Nice job."

She covered her eyes again. "I can't bear to think of that as my first kiss. I hardly even felt it. I was so focused on getting back at you."

Han wanted to tell her again what a stellar job she did, but he held his tongue.

Leia groaned. "And Luke. I can't imagine what he thought."

Luke appeared to feel quite self-satisfied, but Han didn't tell her that.

Her head jerked to face him and her expression changed to one of exasperation. "You were such a…such a…"

"Nerfherder?" he suggested.

She nodded, pressing her lips together.

Han flashed his most endearing grin. "But I'm not really scruffy looking, right?"

Leia narrowed her eyes, but Han could see she was trying not to smile.

"Hey, someone even told me I'm handsome," he said innocently.

Now she smiled and eventually began to chuckle softly. "Well, at least if I had to do something foolish, it served its purpose."

"Yeah, it did," Han admitted. He did not intend to tell her all of the feelings it had stirred in him: jealousy, hurt, embarrassment, and a small spark of anger. He couldn't deny he had deserved it. But it had been hard on him, nonetheless. It made him feel better knowing the kiss had been so meaningless to Leia.

Leia placed a gentle hand across Han's cheek. "I prefer to think of you as my first kiss."

"I like the sound of that," Han replied in a husky tone. Before she could utter another word, Han shifted her in his arms, stood up, and placed one arm behind her knees. His other arm cradled her back. He carried her off in the direction of his cabin.

Leia laughed. "What are you doing?"

Han didn't slow his stride as he answered. "Princess, let's see what other firsts I can think of to do to you." His eyes twinkled into hers.


	18. Chapter 18: Wonderings of a Wookiee

From his vantage point in the galley, Chewbacca could see Han and Leia talking quietly in the crew lounge. For twenty-five days, Chewie had been trying to give the couple some space. It was not always easy on a ship the size of the Millennium Falcon. He had become more familiar with human mating customs than he had ever hoped to be.

He had known for a long time that his Captain had a soft spot for the young Princess. Knowing Han as well as he did, it had been easy to observe. Sometimes it had been painful to watch him do everything wrong with her. Even he knew that a woman like Leia required a softer approach than Han employed.

At the beginning, Chewie thought that Leia would never return Han's affections. But slowly, over time, he realized they would be an excellent match.

He had often thought of human women as somewhat frivolous and weak. But, the Princess had earned his respect immediately on the Death Star and had proven to be as brave as any Wookiee, in spite of her small stature and lack of claws.

He was beginning to go stir crazy. They had finished all possible repairs days ago. The rest would have to wait until they arrived at Bespin. There was little to do in the meantime. Han and Leia were so wrapped up in each other, they did not seem the least bit bored.

The change in their dynamic amazed Chewie. It was as if all of a sudden, a button had been pressed that released the stream of hostility that had existed between them all this time.

He sympathized with them when he thought about what would happen once the ship was repaired. It was too dangerous for Han to remain with the Rebellion. If it wasn't for the price on his head, Chewie was quite certain that Han wouldn't leave Leia. He had never seen his Captain like this with a woman. His romantic affairs were always casual and short-lived. But Chewie had noticed a long time ago that Han's interest in the Princess was different.

In the past, Han would not have risked himself the way he did on Hoth. It had been too close a call when they were on the cusp of freedom. Going back to the Command Center to insure Leia's safety had been akin to a death wish. Chewie had been worried that Han would be crushed by falling ice or captured by the Imperials. He never before would have believed that the Corellian would risk everything just for a woman. His thoughts were interrupted when Leia entered the galley.

"Chewie," she called quietly.

He turned and growled softly in response.

"Since we have so much time on our hands, would you teach me a little about cooking?"

He was surprised by the request but barked an affirmative reply. At least it would give him something to pass the time.

Leia smiled. "Thank you. Let me know when you would like to get started."

She left the galley and Chewie realized he too was going to miss the little Princess very much.

###

"What are you doin'?"

Han's voice near Leia's ear startled her. From where she sat at the computer console, she hadn't heard him approach. She realized just how much she had let her guard down on this trip. She was usually aware of every little sound. She swiveled to face him. "Writing my report for the Alliance."

He peered at the screen, scanning. "Are you writing about this trip?" he asked, grinning wickedly.

Leia smiled back playfully. "Just the facts."

He gestured to the console. "Anything in there about my sexual prowess?"

Leia stifled a laugh. "No, that wasn't worth mentioning."

Han placed a hand to his chest, feigning indignation. "Ouch." He leaned forward, placing his hands on the arms of her chair and brought his face close to hers. "I haven't heard you complaining." His voice was a seductive whisper. Before Leia could respond, he brought his mouth to her neck and began kissing and licking her in a way that gave her goosebumps.

She exhaled low in the back of her throat and grabbed at his head. Her mouth fell open with a moan and at that moment, Han's lips pulled away from her and he stood suddenly. Disappointment throbbed through her.

He snapped his fingers thoughtfully. "Now, what were you saying?"

Leia stood, pushed Han against the bulkhead, and pulled his face down close to hers. He looked stunned. "I was saying," she whispered into his mouth, "that report isn't really that important." He still looked surprised when Leia kissed him but he quickly recovered and returned her passion.

Han lifted her up as Leia's hands roamed his back and shoulders. She wrapped her legs around his waist, completely lost.

A startled snarl intruded and Han almost lost his balance. Leia's feet dropped reflexively and he lowered her carefully to the floor.

Chewie roared and bellowed while Leia kept her eyes in the vicinity of Han's chest, face burning. Han remained surprisingly subdued during the Wookiee's rant. As Chewbacca finally began to wind down, Han raised his hands defensively.

"All right, all right!" Han groused.

Chewie gave one last roar for good measure and lumbered past them.

"Oh gods, what did he say?" Leia asked, eyes still cast downward.

"You don't wanna know," Han muttered.

Recovering her dignity, Leia looked at him with a sheepish smile. "How is it that I forget everything when you kiss me?"

Han's smile was genuine and unguarded. Leia loved to see him happy, his usual hard edge absent.

He took her hand and tugged her into the corridor. "Come on, Sweetheart. Let's go to our cabin, so I can make you forget everything for the next hour or so."

Leia followed his gentle pull, her mind registering his words with a sudden flooding in her heart. 'Our cabin…' Quite possibly the sweetest words she had ever heard.


	19. AUTHOR'S NOTE

Please excuse the rudeness of my last reviewer. I understand that some people are just plain bitter so I won't hold it against her. Thank you to all the readers of my original fic that has only been inspired by my own perception and imagination. :)


	20. Chapter 19: The Future Lingers

Offering a nod to any authors who ever wrote a scene with Leia on top...just in case anyone wrote it before me LOL ;) Have a great weekend, everyone :)

Leia's head fell back, her body arched as she straddled Han. His hands were at her hips, holding her in place as he pulsed inside her with a slow, steady rhythm, like the waves of an ocean. Pleasure rippled through her with each deep thrust, peaking when he sank into her, teasing as he manipulated her body to pull back from the blissful sensation of being filled by him.

Leia's moans of pleasure grew louder as she matched Han's rhythm, building into a frenzy and taking control of the cadence of their movements.

They cried out in unison with each fast, deep thrust and Han began to lift his hips up, off the bunk, plunging inside her. Shocking waves of bliss rippled through Leia as her entire body began to collapse into a paroxysm of hot, fierce throbs that shook her entire body. She screamed just as she felt Han spasm inside her. She fell prostrate, sweat clinging their bodies together as they both shuddered in the throes of aftershock.

Leia's breathing was hard and heavy as her senses again began to register the world around her. Han's arms cradled her but Leia felt too weak to return the embrace.

As their breath slowly steadied, Han murmured, "You might wanna try to be a little quieter next time. Not that I don't love to hear you scream."

Leia's body was more relaxed than she ever thought possible, her spirit tranquil and content. "Why?"

"That was one of Chewie's complaints." His breath began to steady.

If she had the energy, Leia would have been mortified. As it was, she felt she would have trouble gathering the energy to feel scared if they were attacked by Vader himself at that moment. "Why didn't you tell me this before?" she asked mildly.

"You pushed me against the wall and wrapped your legs around me. You think I could think about anything but getting your clothes off?"

Leia chuckled softly. She felt Han kiss her head.

"You're the most passionate woman I've ever met," Han confided. He exhaled a deep breath. "I knew you would be. With that hot temper."

Leia didn't particularly appreciate being compared to other women, even if it was a positive comparison. But she had to accept that he had a past and so she refrained from commenting.

He shifted beneath her, forcing her gently on her side so he could look at her. He leaned on his elbow, placed his head in his hand, and smiled. "Sometimes I really enjoyed riling you up."

Her lips curled upwards. Normally, she would fling him a sarcastic retort but at the moment she still felt too serene to be bothered. "Yes, I could tell you enjoyed it."

Now he was grinning. "You always looked sexy when you were mad. Such a turn-on."

Her small smile became genuine. "So, all this time, you tormented me so you could get a cheap thrill?"

Han looked mildly offended. "Hey, it wasn't that cheap. I invested three years into it."

Leia was overwhelmed with affection for him. She laughed lightly, moved closer to him, and wrapped her arms tightly around his shoulders. He embraced her with equal enthusiasm, holding her close. They remained clasped together and Leia felt an abrupt sorrow fall over her. They didn't have many days like this left.

She had been pushing the thoughts aside but now that they were nearing the end of their journey, it was getting difficult to maintain. They were living a fantasy. This wasn't reality. Soon, reality would come crashing in on her, shattering this bliss.

Had she ever imagined her first affair, she certainly wouldn't have dreamed it would be on an old, beat-up freighter, hobbling at sublight speed towards a questionable destination. This was certainly not the most romantic setting. But, somehow, here with Han, it was everything she never knew she wanted.

His grip loosened and Leia, feeling vulnerable, clutched him tighter, pressing her cheek to his. He must have sensed something from her because after a moment, he whispered near her ear, "Are you all right?"

"Yes," she lied.

His hand cradled her head. "You don't sound like you are, Sweetheart." He kissed her cheek softly. "Hm?"

She didn't want to look at him, afraid he would read everything she felt in her eyes. She mustered a brave smile and pulled back enough for him to see her. "I'm fine."

He studied her with serious, dissatisfied eyes. "You wanna talk?"

She wavered. They had talked about everything on this trip, except for the one thing that hung over them ferociously. Finally, she let the smile slip away. "I can't help thinking…" she trailed off, looking away from Han, not wanting to say the words.

"About?" he asked patiently.

Leia had a strong feeling he already knew. She distracted herself by lightly tracing the scar on his chin with her finger. It gave her some time to get her emotions under control. "After Bespin," she said quietly, her face impassive now.

There was a long moment of silence. Leia stilled her finger on his chin and met his eyes. He moved his mouth down to kiss her finger. She lowered her hand and they stared at each other solemnly.

Leia broke the silence. "When we get to the fleet…will you leave right away?"

She could clearly see that Han was very affected. His eyes were troubled when he looked down and hesitated. He returned to look at her again.

"Leia," he said slowly.

"You're using my name again. Must be serious," she teased, trying to lighten the tone. But her heart was heavy.

He sighed. "You know I have to go."

"I know," she agreed.

"After what happened on Ord Mantell, I'm a walking dead man. The price on my head is so high that every bounty hunter in the galaxy is probably looking for me."

Leia felt a chill go down her spine. The danger was real, and she realized that she was being selfish. She took his hand in hers. "I know. I'm not trying to get you to stay. I know you can't."

"You know, if it was just my safety I might even risk it." He paused to lift her hand and kiss it tenderly. "But after Ord Mantell…if anything happened to you on account of me, I'd never forgive myself."

Emotion lanced her heart and Leia told herself she would not cry. "What will you do after Jabba?" she asked tentatively. She was afraid of his answer. She knew what she wanted to hear him say.

He looked down at his hand in hers. "I don't know," he murmured. "I can't make any plans for after. There might not _be_ an after."

He was still staring down at their joined hands and Leia's mind went blank, not processing his words. As their meaning registered, her mind reeled and the hair on the back of her neck prickled. "What do you mean there might not be an after?" Her mouth was dry and she could barely croak out the question.

Han looked at her, his mouth a grim line. "I mean, I don't know what's going to happen once I reach Tatooine. I know that Jabba's pretty damn pissed off. And he's not the most forgiving being I've known."

Leia's mouth hung open momentarily. "But you're going to pay him back."

"Yeah, with interest. But it might not be enough." He gripped her hands. "Look, I've never thought ahead. I've always lived for today cause you never know what's going to happen tomorrow. And that's all I can do right now."

Leia nodded her understanding and tried to quell the fear that choked her heart.

"Hey," he soothed. "Don't worry about me." He winked. "I always come out on top." He grinned wolfishly and Leia knew he was trying to distract her. "Although sometimes, I like it when you get on top."

She forced a smile that she knew wasn't fooling him. He kissed her then laid back, pulling her close against his bare chest. They were both quiet but Leia's thoughts were in turmoil.

She had always known Han wouldn't stick around forever. Even on the way to Ord Mantell, when he had told her he was staying indefinitely, she knew there would be a point when he would take off. On Hoth, she had been prepared, with mixed emotions, for his departure. Even now, she had resigned herself to losing him. She knew that when he dropped her off at the Fleet she would probably never see him again.

But now, he would leave and she would never know what happened to him. He could be killed and she wouldn't even know. She closed her eyes against the thought. She would wonder for the rest of her life.

She knew she would go on without him. She had lost everyone she ever loved and had still continued. She never thought she could love like this. And now she would lose him too.

But she would keep fighting the Empire. And if she was killed in the process, it really wouldn't matter very much.


	21. Chapter 21: The Last Supper

Well, this fic is winding down. Just a few more posts. But, next I will be posting an Ord Mantell fic, Mission Misfire, which is a prequel to Foreign Territory. There is also a sequel that I will post after. I must have been channeling George Lucas when I wrote them out of order lol. Thank you again to everyone reading along, it's fun to entertain you guys :)

Sleep eluded Han. He tried to clear his mind but found thoughts of Leia and the future bouncing inside his head like the ball in a smashball court.

Asleep beside him after several hours of tossing and turning fitfully, Leia looked young and angelic. Her dark, thick hair billowed behind her and her face was absent of worries. She looked more beautiful than usual. He could imagine the young woman she would have been had she not been forced into a life of loss and war.

Was he in love with her? Blast it, he probably was. He had never been in love before and hadn't given any thought to what it might feel like.

He was pretty sure she loved him too, although he couldn't fathom why. When they first met, he had been certain she would never go for a guy like him. She was a Princess. And although he had been very attracted to her, had used any excuse to be near her, he never really believed there was a possibility of anything happening between them. But then, slowly, he started to notice something in her eyes when she looked at him. And on Ord Mantell, he became quite certain.

Somewhere, he had once heard that sex was better when you were in love. He had scoffed but was now surprised to find that it was true. He had always wanted to please the women he was with. It was only fair, and honestly, it fed his ego. But pleasing Leia, hearing and feeling her responses to him, turned him on more than he ever thought possible. And being inside her, their bodies fused together…he was getting hard just thinking about it. He hadn't been so easily aroused since he was a horny teenage boy.

She had no idea the hold she had over him. He knew he would do anything for her. He had risked his life time and again on her behalf. It surprised him how much he cared about her feelings. Every time he sensed she was upset he wanted to ease her pain. He had never been much of a talker. Words made him uncomfortable. It was easier to just walk away. But Leia's happiness was tantamount. For the first time, he cared about a woman more than he cared about himself.

It killed him to leave her, knowing it would hurt her. Hell, it would hurt him too, more than he ever dreamed. And it pained him to tell her his suspicions about his fate. But he wanted her to realize that he wasn't leaving because he wanted to, he was leaving because he had no choice. And he couldn't give her any promises.

He deeply regretted letting this debt go unpaid. It was quite possibly the biggest mistake of his life.

He wondered what would happen if he were able to stay. If the war ever ended, Leia's life would change drastically. And where would that leave him? Realistically, he couldn't expect to have a future with her. It was all well and good while they were living underground with the Rebels. But when it came to real life…

What was wrong with him? He was thinking about the future, which completely went against all his principals.

Han banished those thoughts from his mind. What was the point? He was leaving, he had no choice. There was no reason to ponder the 'what ifs.'

But when he was honest with himself, he knew he wanted to tell her that he would come back, that he would find her no matter what. But he couldn't make promises that he might not be able to keep. He couldn't leave her waiting on him. If he didn't make it out of Jabba's palace alive, he didn't want Leia stuck in time, waiting for him to return.

He reached over and ran his hand through her dark tresses, careful not to wake her. She was so beautiful. He hadn't noticed right away on the Death Star; she was so mouthy and had irritated the hell out of him. It was only in the Falcon's cockpit, after escaping the TIE-fighters, when she got that fire in her eyes and told him off that he really saw her for the first time. A slight thrill had gone through him. Then, at the medal ceremony, she had been radiant. Beaming, hair in a much more flattering style, her figure was more visible in a form-fitting gown. Han had been taken aback by just how attractive she was.

He should have known then that he was in trouble. It was in that moment that he decided to hang around and work for the Rebels for a while.

Now here he was, three years later, captivated. The thought of leaving Leia now brought a sharp ache to his chest. It felt vaguely familiar but Han couldn't recall what in his past might have made him feel this way.

Thirteen days from Bespin. Once there, they had two, maybe three days, tops. One more day after that to reach the fleet. Han had grown up on the streets, freed Chewbacca from slavery, smuggled for the biggest crime lords, and piloted through an asteroid field. How could saying good bye to a tiny, slip of a woman be the hardest thing he ever had to do?

###

On the last night of the long journey to Bespin, Leia decided to practice her newly-acquired cooking skills by making dinner to celebrate their safe arrival. So many things could have gone wrong. They were lucky to have survived the trip. It seemed to Han, however, that using the term 'celebrate' was a bit ironic.

Apparently, she had saved some of their better freeze-dried food for tonight. She had insisted that the hesitant Chewbacca join them, that they all needed to celebrate together. Chewie had tried to beg off, but Leia wouldn't take no for an answer. And when she had her mind set on something, Han knew it was better to just give in. Apparently, Chewie knew this too, because here he was, seated in the crew lounge across from Han.

Chewie growled quietly to Han. Han grimaced. "Yeah, I'm a little scared too."

It would be really bad if the food was terrible. He would eat it anyway, but what was he going to say to Leia? _'Nice try, Sweetheart. I'll choke it down?'_ If he lied, she would probably know. If he was honest, she would probably be mad. It was a lose-lose situation.

"Maybe this'll help, Buddy." From under the table, he pulled out a large bottle of Astorian wine. He had been saving it for the last night, for Leia and himself. But it might benefit them most if they drank it with the meal.

Chewie roared enthusiastically as Han filled the three glasses on the table. When he reached for it, Han motioned him to wait. He figured Leia should be there.

She appeared from the corridor, carrying two plates. She looked slightly frazzled.

"You need help?" Han offered.

She shook her head. "No, thank you." She placed a plate in front of each of her companions then disappeared.

Han looked at his plate skeptically as Chewie sniffed. He barked quietly.

Han smiled grimly. "Well, if your big nose doesn't think it smells bad, that's a good sign."

Leia returned with a third plate, set it down in front of the seat next to Han then sat down. She noticed the filled glasses. "What's this?"

Han produced the bottle from the floor and held it up for her approval. "I've been saving this for a special occasion. I guess this is about as special as it's going to get."

Leia smiled and Han wondered what she was thinking. She turned towards her plate. "I hope you like this." She sounded anxious.

 _Right_ , Han thought wryly. He looked at Chewie to find him staring back with the same trepidation he felt. He examined his plate filled with noodles, what looked to be some type of vegetable, and tagorian beans.

"Why do you look terrified?" Leia asked, eyes narrowed.

He shot her an innocent look. "Me?" He pointed at his chest with his thumb. "No way." He hoped he sounded convincing. He mustered a brave smile and dug his fork into the noodles. _Here goes nothing._ He shoveled some food in his mouth and braced himself for impact. He chewed, keeping the smile plastered on his face. As the flavors coalesced in his mouth, he slowly came to the realization…it wasn't bad. He chewed a moment longer, swallowed, then turned to Leia. "Hey. Not bad. I'm impressed."

Leia's smile was crooked. "I guess that's the best I can hope for." But she seemed pleased.

With a dubious expression, Chewie took a bite. He chewed thoughtfully, barked approval, and patted Leia gently on the head.

Leia's smile widened. "I had a good teacher."

Chewie guffawed and returned to his plate.

Han raised his glass. "Hey, a toast."

Leia and Chewie each held up their glasses in turn.

"We made it," Han said simply. He clinked each of their glasses and took a sip. Tomorrow they would arrive on Bespin. The moment was bittersweet.

For the next few hours, Han, Leia, and Chewie talked, joked, and traded stories. Many of Chewie's stories did not portray Solo in the best light. Han felt fortunate that they mostly relied on him to translate.

"I'm not telling her that." Han laughed and shook his head as the Wookiee doubled over with laughter.

"Oh, come on," Leia urged. "Tell me." She was sitting, legs crossed, facing Han and smiling broadly.

He downed the last of his wine. "That goes up with the ship," he told her with a grin.

Chewie stood and informed them that he was done for the night. He gave Leia an affectionate hug around the shoulders then slapped Han on the back a little harder than necessary. Han winced slightly but said nothing.

"Good night, Chewie," Leia called softly after him. He grumbled gently in return.

Silence settled over the lounge. The evening had been a much needed distraction. Now that they were alone, Han was aware that he was feeling emotional and was uncertain what to say. He considered pouring himself another glass of wine then decided it was a bad idea. Who knew what damn fool thing might come out of his mouth if he were drunk. Instead, he took Leia's hand in his. They stared into each other's eyes and Han felt as if they were saying so much without uttering a word.

She squeezed his hand and he leaned forward to kiss her, long and slow. She clutched his shoulders and he wished she never had to let go. Dimly, he wondered when he had turned into such a sap of a man.

When their lips parted, Leia spoke first. "When we started towards Bespin, thirty-eight days seemed endless," she said with quiet seriousness. "But it went by very quickly."

"It did," Han agreed, matching her tone.

She sat back and looked at him and Han could tell she was contemplating her next words. "I'm going to miss you," she finally said in a soft whisper.

It tugged at Han's heart. His eyes fell to the floor and it took several heartbeats to form the words he had been wanting to say for days. "You could come with me," he said casually, not looking at her. He waited a long moment. When she didn't respond, nerves fluttered in his stomach and he forced his gaze back to hers.

She watched him wistfully. "You know I can't do that." Her voice was barely audible.

He knew. He had known it was a terrible idea to ask before the words even left his mouth. But, somehow that hadn't stopped him.

Leia leaned close and placed a hand across his cheek. "Take me to bed, Han," she whispered. "Let's forget for a little while."

For a long moment, Han looked into her eyes. Then he stood slowly, gently pulling Leia to her feet. He swept her into his arms and kissed her passionately before carrying her to the cabin.


	22. Chapter 22: The Very Last Time

Hope everyone (in the states) had a great Thanksgiving! Have a great weekend :)

They kneeled on the bunk, undressing each other slowly. Gently, Han pushed Leia onto the bed and moved over her, eyes on hers, his hand gingerly stroking the hair away from her face. He kissed her more tenderly than usual and Leia wondered if there was a way to make this night last forever.

She held his face in her hands and looked at him for an endless moment, memorizing his features. His eyes were vulnerable and it touched Leia in some deep, intimate place. She pulled his mouth to hers in a searing kiss.

Slow, lingering caresses seemed to bring time to a standstill. Han shifted to his back and pulled her on top of him, burying a hand in her hair and tracing the line of her jaw with a finger. He touched her lower lip and Leia took his finger in her mouth, eliciting a deep groan from Han. He rolled her to her back and his lips and tongue drifted slowly along her ear, her neck, her breasts, pleasure throbbing through her.

His mouth trailed down her stomach and Leia shuddered in anticipation. He moved with agonizing slowness, teasing her mercilessly. When she could wait no longer, she grabbed his head and pushed him lower.

His tongue between her legs was bliss, grazing her slowly, softly, his heat flooding through her in gushing waves. It seemed an eternity until she crashed over the edge into pure rapture and her body spiraled inside. When she thought Han would stop, his tongue moved faster, bursting her senses into a hot, bright light.

While her body still fluttered quietly, Han was suddenly at her mouth, kissing her, his mouth slick. He positioned himself to enter her but Leia pushed him back. "Not yet," she whispered harshly.

His expression was pained but when Leia pushed him forcefully to his back, he looked pleasantly surprised. She smiled up at him as she kissed him low on his stomach. She thought she should feel awkward with inexperience but her mind was filled with the desire to bring him the same pleasure he gave her.

She circled his bellybutton with her tongue and heard him growl deep in his throat, spurring her on. When she took him in her mouth, he inhaled sharply. She was tentative at first, but the more Han moaned, the bolder Leia became. She was quick to find the rhythm that made him cry out repeatedly, until he pulled at her arm. "Stop," he hissed breathlessly.

Leia allowed herself to be pulled up to face him. He rolled her to her back and their gazes held for what felt like an eternity. Leia saw in his eyes all the words he would never say to her. And that was okay. In that moment, she knew how he felt.

Eyes still locked together, Han drove himself inside her. Her body enfolded him and he grabbed her hands and clasped them over her head. He moved inside her, deeper with each thrust and Leia felt an overwhelming emotion rise from the innermost part of her. She loved this man. How had she ever denied it?

With that thought, she let the physical sensations sweep her away on a current of passion. Han's movements inside her grew frenzied and as he started to shudder and blaze inside her, her body surrendered to the tremulous, final thrusts that Han spent. She wrenched her hands free from his and dug her nails into his back as her body shook and she cried out, riding out the ebb of climax.

Depleted, their limbs remained tangled. Intense emotion claimed them both as they lay together, sharing their thoughts and feelings without words.


	23. Chapter 23: Nothing's Changed, Except

One more post to go after this! But up soon, my next fic, Mission Misfire, which takes place on Ord Mantell and is a prequel to Foreign Territory. Almost as Bespin now, hope you've all enjoyed the trip :)

Leia woke slowly, eyelids fluttering. She reached for Han but he wasn't there. She checked the chrono. It was later than she realized. She laid back, feeling the full weight of this, the last day of their journey.

She pushed aside all melancholy feelings. They wouldn't do her any good. This was hardly the first time she had stifled her pain.

She dressed, once again donning the despised coldsuit. It wouldn't exactly be appropriate to depart the ship in Han's cut-up shirt and sleep shorts. When her hair was braided tightly and affixed to the top of her head she looked in the reflector. Who was this woman staring back at her?

She found Han in the cockpit, examining the console in front of him. He looked her up and down but said nothing about her outfit. "Hey," he said quietly. His face was impassive.

"Good morning." Leia felt an odd tension in the air. She remained in the doorway. "You should've woken me."

He shrugged. "I figure you should get some sleep while you can."

They looked at each other in awkward silence until Leia couldn't stand it anymore. She moved to stand before him and ran her hands through his hair. He sighed and leaned into her, resting his head on her chest.

He looked up at her and his smile dispelled any strain between them. She smiled back and all was currently right in their small, intimate world.

"What's our ETA?" she asked.

Han glanced away from her to a readout. "We should enter the atmosphere in twenty-two minutes."

Leia nodded, filled with mixed emotions. She wasn't sure if her unease stemmed from a future without Han or anxiety about what awaited them on Bespin. "I hope you're right about this friend of yours."

"Trust me," he urged. It was a familiar response, usually offered when he was about to enter them into an objectionable situation.

She raised an eyebrow. "Where have I heard that before?"

He eyed her clothing again. "Maybe we can get you some new clothes at Cloud City."

She gave him a caustic look. "Maybe we can find some new clothes for you, too."

He grinned and held her more tightly.

Chewie lumbered into the cockpit and greeted Leia. She smiled and rubbed his arm affectionately, then moved aside so he could deposit his huge form in the copilot's seat.

Han gave her a quick kiss and turned to face the controls. Leia strapped herself into the navigator's chair, filled with trepidation. She had a bad feeling about this.

The cockpit door swished open again and Threepio shuffled inside. "Captain Solo, I noticed you are about to enter Bespin's atmosphere."

"You're real observant, Metalmouth," Han bit back.

The protocol droid ignored Han's sarcasm. "I think it best if I strap in. My circuits are quite delicate."

Before Han could respond, Leia intervened. "Have a seat, Threepio. I'll strap you down." She knew Han's patience with the droid had been sorely tested over the course of this journey.

Han was all business now. "Chewie, prepare to enter the atmosphere."

Leia returned to her seat, trying to quell her anxiety. Cloud City was currently their only hope. If this friend of Han's refused to help them, she didn't know what they were going to do. She took a deep, calming breath. It was difficult to be optimistic when even the simplest of plans always seemed to go awry. But, they did deserve some luck this time around. Perhaps things would go smoothly.

She stared at the back of Han's head, trying not to mourn the end of their journey. She felt like a completely different person now. It was going to be difficult to go back to business-as-usual.

Han set the controls to manual. "Here we go…"


	24. Chapter 24: New Allegiances

Well, here we are at the end. Thank you to all who took the time to read this :) If you enjoyed it, please look for my next fic, Mission Misfire. It is the prequel to this story in a series of three called Reversal. Have a wonderful weekend!

Epilogue

Leia Organa had taken private quarters on the Medical Frigate to stay close to Luke. He was all she had now.

Sharp grief swept through her again and she closed her eyes to dam the tears. It was so hard to believe that Han was gone, trapped in that horrid block of carbonite, enduring some hellish nightmare. Was he conscious? Was he in pain? She hoped desperately that he wasn't in some wakeful state that allowed him such awareness.

She hadn't told Luke about Han and herself. She hadn't needed to. Somehow, he had already known. He hadn't confided in her either. She didn't know what exactly had happened with Darth Vader, but it had changed Luke. He seemed suddenly much older. Vader…

Standing in the harsh, surreal light of the carbon freezing chamber, Leia had stared at Vader through her fear and heartache. Never before had she been so certain that a monster hid behind that mask.

Nothing was as it had been. How had the galaxy turned end over end and spat them out? Hadn't the Empire taken enough from her? She had already lost her entire planet and everyone she ever loved. Now, they had taken Han too. Leia felt broken.

She had to stay strong. Again. She had to believe that Lando and Chewie would get to Han and that she could rescue him. As soon as they secured his exact location, she would meet them and launch a rescue mission. She couldn't function until then. She never thought anything would cause her allegiance to the Alliance to waver. She never thought she would abandon them for personal gain. But she had no choice. She couldn't _not_ do it. She had never before been selfish. This time, she would put her wants and desires first. This one time.

At least she had told him she loved him. She regretted not saying it hundreds of times before.

 _'_ _I know.'_

Of course he had. He knew how she felt before she herself did. She could still see him as they lowered the platform, the fear and regret etched in his face. That last moment of anguish…

Desolation filled her and, for a moment, she couldn't bear it. The loss was crippling.

No. She couldn't let this destroy her. She had to endure. For Han.

END


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